5th Birthday Taylor Swift Playlist!

Hello Everyone! It’s been 5 years of The Marina Chronicle! (Can you believe it? I cannot. At all.)

To celebrate, I’m doing a bunch of stuff, but here’s the first thing. I made a playlist of Taylor Swift songs. Just Taylor Swift, all of which have vibes for certain characters and moments.

Some are repeated from the main playlist, most aren’t.


  1. “Mine” – This is Aaron and Athena’s song. 
  2. “Sparks Fly” – This is a Raymond and Wyatt song. I heart those boys and I’m so happy to finally get to tell their story
  3. “Haunted” – Brayton, OBVIOUSLY
  4. “Long Live” – For my three chosen ladies. May they slay dragons forever
  5. “Blank Space” – William Santino’s opportunistic fuckboy anthem
  6. “All You Had To Do Was Stay” – Marina for Tristan
  7. “mad woman” – Really everyone, but especially Nika
  8. “This Love” – Lefty and Marina, eternally bound and in love
  9. “willow” – Eric and Annalise (Eric has a lot of Taylor feelings)
  10. “cowboy like me” – 
  11. “Wildest Dreams” – Annalise and Harran, all sex and yearning, none of it real.
  12. “White Horse” – Brea and Harran
  13. “The Way I Loved You” – Annalise for Tristan, toxicity wrapped in first love
  14. “Forever And Always” – Annalise for Eric…you’ll know when you know
  15. “Endgame” – From the original playlist, this is all Eric. No interest in being just another ex Annalise doesn’t want to see
  16. “Delicate” – Nika and Marina, not sure where they’re at yet.
  17. “Getaway Car” – Tom & Trey, heavy love with no shot at longevity for previous feelings reasons
  18. “New Year’s Day” 
  19. “The Man” – Need I explain?
  20. “Paper Rings” – Tristan and Carolina, all sweetness and optimism
  21. “I Knew You Were Trouble” – 
  22. “Stay Stay Stay”
  23. “Starlight”
  24. “The Last Time” – Tristan and Marina



Entering the ballroom with Mr. DuKarras actually feels much better than if I were on my own. I don’t think I’m ready to talk to Damian again, and now I’m petrified to see Nika. I’d been thinking about her nearly all day.

The way she smiled shyly when she looked at me. The way she understood me without having to explain myself. And that warm feeling that filled my body when she’d touched me today. I caught Raymond’s eye and he walked over.

“Mr. DuKarras, may I present my cousin Sir Raymond Quents,” I smiled. “Raymond this is Mr. Angelo DuKarras, his daughter is marrying Tristan.”

“Of course,” Raymond said, “do you have a moment?” I nodded and followed him out to the terrace. “Are you alright?” I frowned at him.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” I asked. He rolled his eyes. “I am fine. It isn’t my fault Damian has decided to be unreasonable.”

“He’s terrified.” Raymond said softly. “We all are, you see that don’t you?” I sighed.

“I’m terrified,” I said sharply, “none of us know what will happen next and I won’t let him act like he’s the only one struggling with this.” Raymond sighed. “He knew Tristan was coming back, and he either trusts me or he doesn’t.” I frowned. “And I really don’t appreciate him sending you to fight his battles.”

“Rina,” Raymond said with a frown, “what else is it?” I swallowed.

“It’s not important,” I said, “I have to go. Annalise is going to need me.” He nodded. “Raymond,” I whispered, “is he angry?”

“He isn’t here,” Raymond said gently, I looked down, “I think that’s some indication of his feelings.” I nodded. “You’re angry though, and that matters. He’s taking you for granted, isn’t he?”

“It can feel like it,” I said softly. “I’ll find him when I can.” He nodded and I walked inside. I saw Nika standing with her sister and Harran and looked away before our eye contact lasted too long. I had to decide how I felt about that before I could engage with her.

I went to the throne and stood with Aaron and his mother who were looking at me.

“You look flushed, Marina,” The Dowager said softly. I exhaled.

“Do I?” I said softly. She nodded. “I suppose I’ve just been rushing around a little.” She smiled.

After the presentation I found myself on the terrace again.

“Duchess?” I turned and Nika was standing behind me. “I wanted to apologize.”

“You don’t need to,” I said softly as she walked over. “I wasn’t offended.”

“I would hope a daughter of Anessa wouldn’t be,” she grinned. I laughed. “But I was too forward. I know you aren’t interested,” I stopped her.

“Who says I’m not?” I said softly. She shook her head. “I mean, I,” I swallowed, “I Dreamed you, and since this afternoon, I haven’t been able to stop thinking of you.” She swallowed and looked away.

“You are spoken for,” she said gently. I swallowed and nodded. “And we have work to do.”

“Yes,” I said. “I suppose.” I stepped closer to her. “Do you think about me?” I whispered. She nodded. Slowly our hands touched. “Nika,” I said softly.

“Please don’t play with me,” she said gently, “please.” I shook my head.

“I wouldn’t,” I said softly, “I don’t know what this is, but it’s not a game, I promise.” She smiled and leaned closer. Our foreheads touched.

“Do you know that you shine?” Nika whispered. I swallowed. “I know the Queen must see it. My sister sees it, and it blinds me.” I felt like I was drawing breath from her and her from me. “Whatever the Goddess poured into you is singular.”

“You’re warm,” I said softly. She looked at me. “You fill up a the room with warmth when you walk in.” She smiled and kissed me then. Softly, slowly, I drew closer to her, her black robes tangling with my silver dress, as we let go. She swallowed.

“I won’t lie, or sneak with your,” she said softly. I nodded.

“I love Damian,” I said in the same tone. “But I want to know you.” She smiled.

“Well, then,” she said. “We’ll get to know each other.” I laughed.

“Nika,” Brea walked out, “I think we should go to bed.”

“Alright,” she said softly and walked away I swallowed and walked down to the beach and then home. I was ready for bed and I didn’t want to lose the floaty feeling that kissing Nika had given me. I walked into the hall and went upstairs. Damian was already in my bedroom.

“Oh,” I said, “I wasn’t expecting you.” He nodded.

“Clearly,” he muttered, “I think we need to talk.”



“I’ll jump in the harbor before sitting down with that man,” Damian said slamming his glass down. Raymond rolled his eyes and Eric sighed loudly. “I’m serious, Eric.”

“You’re being dramatic,” he mumbled and rubbed his fingers in a circle around his temple. I looked at him.

“I don’t think I am,” Damian growled, I put my hand on his arm. I could feel the anger radiating off of him. “It’s like Daniel is trying to annoy us back.”

“It wouldn’t be his stupidest idea,” Raymond said. “Sending Franz to actually lead an invasion would be stupider.”

“Who is he?” I asked. “Athena’s asked me to have him here for dinner, she called it neutral ground.”

“I repeat my intention to jump in the harbor,” Damian said. “He’s a pompous idiot who’s nose is so far up King Daniel’s ass I’m surprised he can breathe.”

“If he were just a sycophant that would be bad enough,” Raymond said, “he also happens to be a favorite of my sister’s which means even if Daniel got sick of him, he’d still have power.” He looked at Eric. “You may have to go home, Eric. Talk them down.”

“It won’t come to that,” Eric said, “we’ll all be at dinner.” Damian growled, “all, Lefty, I won’t hear another word about it.” He looked at me. “You don’t mind?”

“No,” I said, “of course not.” He smiled. “He’ll behave.” Damian glared at me. “Won’t you my love?”

“To spare you embarassment,” he kissed me, “but I won’t like it.” I smiled softly. “I need to check on,” he swallowed.

“Of course,” I said, he needed to make sure that the Addisons were alright, to be with his old friends. “Give them my best.” He nodded and stormed out.

“I don’t envy Dorian Addison right now,” Raymond said and shut the book he was reading. Eric sighed. “Did Franz horse whip him, or something? He’s normally fine with officers.”

“It’s about his mother, isn’t it?” I asked softly. Eric looked at me and nodded. “It usually is.” I sighed. “I need a little more information though.”

“Of course you do,” Eric said. “I don’t know a lot about him personally. Professionally he’s a nightmare, of course, and thinks he’s my superior.”

“I noticed that part,” I said. I looked at Raymond.

“What? You think because I actually lived at court I know all of Elana’s little friends’ foibles?” He sighed. I shrugged. “He’s a flatterer. He already knows Annalise is a lost cause, but he’ll try to get in with you. Probably the Dowager Countess too. He understands how women wield power in Phania. The way you do it here might confuse him, you can use that.”

“I was thinking more what sort of food to serve, but thank you,” I smiled, “that was very helpful.” He shrugged.

“Whatever you serve will be fine,” Eric said with a loud sigh. “Maybe source from the Pharra neighborhood? You can mention it, and he’ll appreciate it?” I frowned. “The Admiral is Pharras, in fact, he’s angling to be appointed governor.”

“So that clears that up,” Raymond said, “are we done? I’m supposed to show Nika the maps we’ve been working on.” Eric nodded and he left.

“The Admiral doesn’t support independence then?” I said. Eric shook his head. “Neither do you, though.”

“Ah, but that’s different,” Eric said, “I’m Phanian, I don’t know any better.” I laughed. “He views it as a betrayal, not helped by Franz’s blunt reminders of Lefty’s birth every chance he gets.”

“He said he out ranks you,” I frowned. “Is that true?”

“Technically, if we were on a ship yes, he’s an admiral, I’m a captain,” Eric shrugged, “but as a senior advisor and the heir, and on foreign soil, we’re about on an even playing field. Daniel likely did just send him verses someone else to annoy me.”

“Well, that’s helpful,” I said. “He’s also middle of the pecking order, I know how to handle that.”

“Oh, you’re funny,” Eric sighed and stretched, before standing up. “Marina, I,” he sighed, “Annalise and I never want our complications to become your complications.” I shrugged.

“I know you all tease me about it but it’s all linked,” I said softly. “My mandate is to aid her mandate, her setbacks are mine. That’s how it works.” He sighed.

“I can still feel guilty about it though, right?” He winked.

“Oh by all means,” I nodded and walked over to my desk and picked up a pen. “Torture yourself, that doesn’t bother me at all.” He walked over and kissed me on the cheek.

“If we go back,” he said, “you’re really coming with us?”

“That is the current plan yes,” I said softly. He nodded. “Why?”

“I’m working on a letter to my sister in law,” he shrugged, “I light mention of you wouldn’t go amiss.” I rolled my eyes. “This is all very delicate.”

“I know that,” I said, “so does he. But we can’t make him be happy about it Eric.”

“No,” he sighed, “I suppose we can’t.” He looked at me.

“Do you need something else?” I said. He sighed loudly. “Eric, I really do have a lot to do.”

“If Tristan Dugarry comes back,” he said. I sighed.

“When he comes back,” I said, “he is always going to come back.” He nodded. “She’ll choose you,” I said softly. He smiled sadly.

“You’re so sure?” He asked. I nodded. “Why?”

“Because he’s not coming back for her,” I said simply. “Not in that way. He’s coming back for his family and his duty, with a wife, who, unless he’s lying to me in his letters, he’s quite fond of.” Eric nodded. “And if I’m wrong, we’ll handle that too,” I swallowed. He nodded. “Are you,” I swallowed, “are you only asking for yourself?” He smiled sadly.

“He doesn’t know how to bring it up,” he admitted. I sighed. “You two are writing then?”

“Yes,” I said softly. “We’ve always written, when we aren’t together. Tristan’s my oldest friend, Eric, before he’s anything else.” He nodded. “He doesn’t mention her much, which is different.” He sighed and nodded. “We can’t do this without him,” I swallowed, “Athena and me, I mean. We need him.”

“Fine,” he said and stood up. “But you can’t expect us to be happy about it.” I snorted.

“Don’t worry,” I muttered as he left. “I don’t.”

Pep Talk


We’ve all been on edge these past few weeks, but meeting with the witches seems to have brought everything to a boil. Annalise is furious, Aaron is smug with I Told You So’s, Athena’s just gone off to train, which means she’s frustrated, and it’s all I can do to not scream as loud as I can.

Instead I left and walked to the apartment Raymond, Damian and Eric have been sharing and was surprised to see Eric opening the door.

He’d been keeping to himself lately. And he looked awful.

“He’s not here,” he mumbled, “I think he went down into town.” I nodded and shifted my weight. “Can I help you with something, Marina?”

“I suppose not,” I said. He nodded. “Eric, I,” I wanted to apologize, I wasn’t sure why. He blinked at me. “Are you staying for us?” He laughed at that.

“To be honest, I’m not sure why I’m staying,” he admitted. “For you and Lefty, maybe, for Raymond, I suppose, because I’m a fool?” I looked at him.

“No one thinks you’re a fool, Eric,” I whispered gently. He frowned and shook his head.

“I am though,” he whispered.

“Have you tried talking to her?” I asked gently. He shook his head.

“I doubt that would help,” he admitted. “I think we talked too much as it is.” I looked kindly at him. “I’ll tell him you stopped by.”

“Alright,” I said quietly, “but I still think,” he laughed. “Well, you should talk to someone.” He looked at me

“How were the witches?” He asked. I sighed. “Oh, it went that well?”

“They were a little insulted that the rest of us were there,” I admitted. He nodded. “And one of them clearly has some kind of history with Harran, and she didn’t seem overly pleased to see him.”

“Uh huh,” he nodded. “And do you think my presence would have been helpful?” I bit my lip.

“I think it could be now,” I sighed, “I think she’s better when you’re around, I think she thinks more clearly, and I know she misses you.” He sighed and rubbed his face. “It might not hurt you to sober up first, though.”

“I’m not drunk,” he said. I raised my eyebrows, “right now. I was, and I likely will be, but at the moment, I am not.”

“Alright,” I said softly. “Well, might I suggest going to dinner rather than getting drunk by yourself?” He sighed. “Eric, please,” he swallowed and slid a hand against my cheek. “Don’t do that.”

“Lefty said if we leave you’re coming with us?” He said. I nodded. “That’s something of a comfort,” he left the door open and I followed him inside, “I won’t have ruined his life, Annalise didn’t ruin yours.” I frowned at him.

“Well, first of all, I don’t think that it’s a matter of you two ruining our lives,” I grumbled, “and Damian is mostly blaming King Daniel if you must know.”

“I see,” he nodded. “Well, Daniel makes for a good scapegoat most of the time.” He frowned. “Is it public with Harran?” I took the drink he handed me.

“It isn’t exactly,” she said, “it’s not like with you. Closer to how it was with Tristan, everyone knows, but no one is admitting that they know.”

“Oh how fun,” Eric nodded downing his drink. “That was so much fun for me, and I wasn’t even in love with her then.” I sighed and shook my head.

“Does she know how you feel?” I asked softly. He looked at me.

“I would assume so,” he shrugged. I groaned. “We did talk about it, but well, I doubt it matters.” I looked at him. “She chose him.”

“Because you neglected her,” I said simply. “For the love of Rana, Eric, she was in love with you too, I think she might still be, but you humiliated her. If you want her to know how you feel be a man and tell her and show her.” I stood up, “I have work to do, and you have decisions to make.” I walked outside and leaned against the wall.

“Oh, there you are,” Damian said walking over to me. “I stopped at the manor but I couldn’t find you.” I kissed him and he pressed me against the wall.

“You should get in there,” I said, “I think I convinced him to come to dinner.”

“Even you can’t work such miracles,” he laughed. I shrugged.

“You need to tell him,” I said softly. He sighed, “he mentioned me coming with you, but nothing else?”

“He won’t like it,” he whispered, “I don’t like it.” I kissed him again. “Marina, sweetheart, do you think there’s any other way.”

“That depends on them.” I said softly. “But for us to stay together and not have war, otherwise.” He nodded. “No, I don’t think there is.” He sighed.

“How were the witches?” He asked. I sighed. “Oh, well, I’ll be at your side tonight.” I kissed him.

“I’d hope so,” I said softly. “See you later.” I walked down to Annalise’s rooms. She was lying on the couch with a cool cloth over her eyes, placed there no doubt by a lazy looking Mercy who was ironing a dress. She looked at me. “Well, this is an idyllic scene.” She sighed. “You’re feeling worse?”

“People usually like me when they meet me at first,” she said glumly. “I’m very charismatic, and lovely.”

“You are both of those things,” I agreed, “but maybe witches are different.” She pulled the cloth off her face. “Where is Harran?”

“Smoothing things over with Brea,” Mercy said, “Elodie and Athena are helping the sister.”

“Nika,” I said instinctively. I knew I had to talk to her. “Lisette, I think you’ll need to talk to Eric tonight.” She pulled the cloth off her face.

“I would happily if her would speak to me!” She said. “Will he?” I shrugged.

“I tried,” I said and pulled her up.



I was startled awake in the morning to Marina calling my name out and standing over my bed.

“Good morning,” she said and tossed a simple walking dress at me. Harran woke up too and bleerily rubbed his eyes. “Your Highness.”

“Duchess,” he murmured. “Is the sun even up yet?”

“Yes,” Marina said, marching over to the windows and throwing open the curtains. “Get dressed, I need to talk to you.” I stared at her in disbelief.

“So you’re speaking to me now?” I said. She sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Clearly,” she mumbled. “We need to go to the temple, and we need Raymond and Athena too.” I sighed.

“Did you Dream?” I tried. She nodded. “Bad?”

“I thought I was going to drown,” she said. Harran rubbed the back of his head and looked at her.

“Aren’t you chosen of sea goddess?” He asked. I shushed him and went and sat down with her. “I’m just saying wouldn’t that make drowning difficult?”

“I was North, I think,” she said, “at least it was cold, and the sea was,” she shuddered, “angry and out of control, and then she said that The Dark Lady would fill the chaos.”

“Who said?” I asked. “Rana?”

“No,” she whispered, “no she wasn’t,” she shook her head, “I didn’t know her. She was all in black, and veiled, but I could see her eyes,” she exhaled. Harran was out of bed and dressed now. I looked at him.

“And she called Amina, ‘The Dark Lady?'” He said. She looked at him and nodded. “Oh, she’s a witch.”

“Calling people witches is rude, Harran,” I said.

“No,” he said and kissed me, “calling you two,” he pointed at us, “witches is rude, because you aren’t. But the tribes have witches, real ones. They commune with the newly dead, and heal and perform marriage and burial and naming rites.”

“Oh,” Marina said. “And they veil their faces and dress in all black?” He shrugged.

“Sometimes,” he said. “But usually only for official duties.” I stared at him. “What?”

“And they serve Amina?” I asked.

“No,” he said, “they serve the tribes. They don’t serve any god in particular. They’re aligned with Amina in some ways because of their rites of the dead.” Marina was staring at him. “At least one of my brothers will likely marry witches, it’s quite common for them to marry into chieftan families.”

“She said she’d grown bored,” Marina said, “and she had these eyes,” I looked at her. And Harran nodded.

“They all have nice eyes,” he mused. I elbowed him. “Not as nice as yours obviously.” Marina snorted. “You didn’t get a name?”

“No,” Marina said. “She was about my height, but that’s not guaranteed in Dreams. I used to Dream this one was ten feet tall.” She nodded to me. “She seemed to know me.”

“What do you mean, they’re aligned with Amina, but don’t serve her?” I said. Harran sighed.

“We don’t see The Dark Lady the same way you do,” he explained. “It’s not about Rana and Cornan having superiority, it’s about the triad being in balance.” I looked at him. “The Witches are as much a part of that as The Masteros. Being of the tribes they were able to mostly escape Brayton’s purges, but, well,” he shrugged. “It’s been a hard decade for all of us.” I looked at him.

“Are there many witches our age?” Marina asked eagarly.

“No,” he said, “only a handful.” I looked at him again, and touched his face.

“Ah,” she nodded, and then stood up, “I need to talk to Raymond.” She swept out of the room and then backed back in. “Thanking you for your help, Harran. Lisett, I am still angry with you, but a little bit less.” She bounced out.

“I should probably go with her,” I said and stood up, “by dinner tonight she might even like me again.” He laughed and kissed me.

“We can only hope,” he said, “do you want to send for a witch?” I looked at him.

“Yes,” I said softly, “and I trust who you choose.” He nodded.

The Cave


I woke up early and walked down to the beach where Eric was waiting with a small boat. I smiled at him, as he worked through the rigging.

“Athena said I had to make sure you weren’t trying to kidnap me,” I raised my eyebrows. He flipped down and laughed.

“I am not,” he said and pulled me close. “But I’m surprised she didn’t try to come along.” I kissed him.

“She knows better,” I said as he helped me on board. “Where are we going?” He winked.

“A surprise,” he said. I sighed and we sailed around the cliffs. It felt nice and there was something wonderful about watching Eric sail. He’s so at home in it. He keeps looking back at me and smiling, and he finally stopped the boat and I looked at him.

“It’s a cliff,” I said looking up.

“We aren’t there yet,” he shook his head. I looked around. “Can you swim?”

“We had a lake at Pantona,” I said, “and a Sea Goddess has chosen me as her vessel in this world, so I think I can manage.” He grinned and then stripped off his shirt and pants, revealing only a pair of tight shorts. I looked down at my own overdress and skimpy shift.

“Are you coming?” He asked. “You’re welcome to stay.” I sighed and shook my head pulling off the overdress and shift, leaving only my linen underthings and a thin chemise. He looked me up and down. “Even better than I imagined, Your Majesty.” He dove off the boat and I quickly jumped in to join him. “You’re going to have to hold your breath.”

“Alright,” I said and we both inhaled deeply, diving down, I followed him below the water line and saw an under water cave we emerged and I took a gulp of breath. I swallowed and paddled close to Eric.

“Look around, Annalise,” he said softly. I glanced up and saw a glimmer of sky above us and but it wasn’t at all dark, just glowing. The stone was glowing. It was absolutely beautiful.

“Oh,” I said softly.

“You see why I wanted you to see it?” He asked. I nodded. He swam closer to me and kissed me. I pulled myself into him. “Anya,” he whispered. I smiled and noticed a small ledge. I swam to it and got pushed out, he followed me and we kissed again. I was desperate for him.

“Eric,” I mumbled, as he lay down next to me and traced a finger down my side. We kissed more, and I wrapped my leg around him.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said. “Gods, how are you so beautiful?” I reached down to grip him. “Not here.” I frowned and sat up.

“Why did you bring me here, then?” I said and dove back into the water.

“I wanted you to see it,” he said, “I thought, I don’t know, you’d enjoy yourself.” I lowered myself below the water.

“I was,” I said. He dove in after me. “If you don’t want me, I don’t know what else to say.”

“Of course I want you,” he said, “Goddess, Annalise, how could you think,” I sighed. “I thought you understood, though.”

“I understand that every time we get close you make an excuse,” I said. “It’s never the right time or place, Eric, but do you want me?” I swam close to him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

“More than anything,” he whispered, “but well,” I looked away.

“You still don’t trust me,” I said.

“It isn’t a matter of trust,” he insisted. “I don’t want to ruin this.”

“Fine,” I said. “I think we should go back.”

“Anya,” he sighed.

“Don’t call me that,” I said and dove under the water swimming back out to the boat. We sailed back in silence and I gathered my clothes, redressing and heading back to the palace without speaking to him. I glanced at the training field and hugged myself.

If Eric didn’t want me, that was fine. It wasn’t as though I didn’t have other options.

“How was your sail?” Marina said walking in. She looked at my face. “Oh dear, what did he do?” I rolled my eyes as she pulled out a dinner gown and held it up for me. I shook my head.

“It’s what he didn’t do,” I muttered, “I’m tired of trying with him.” She sat down with me.

“So stop trying,” she said softly. I looked at her. I knew it broke her heart. If Eric left that meant Lefty would leave too. “I don’t want you to be miserable Annalise.” She went back to the wardrobe and pulled out a soft satin gown, a light grey color, more tightly and low cut than most of the others. “But maybe even letting him see what he’s missing could help?” I grinned.

“Funny, I had the same thought,” I said. She nodded and handed it to me. I walked over behind a screen to change. “Can you see that Prince Harran is seated with me tonight?” She laughed.

“Of course,” she said. “I’ll brush out your hair too, if you’d like. No braids.” I closed my eyes and sighed. We’d both been adopting more Phanian styles as we’d been south. I’d become particularly attached to my tight, long braids.

“No,” I said, “I like them.” I stepped out and she gasped. “I haven’t really worn it, it’s good?”

“It’s phenomenal,” she said. “And these,” she clasped a set of pearl bracelets, one on each wrist, and then a small delicate silver chain around my neck. I sit down as she coils my braids into an impressive knot on top of my head and then set an array of diamond clips shaped like stars as a crown around it.

“You know that you’re way too good at this, I don’t know how I’m going to get by when I have to give someone else a turn as Lady In Waiting,” I said. She shook her head and put her chin on my shoulder.

“I’ll be a dragon training them.” she grinned. I laughed. “Come on, time for you to dazzle.” I looked at her.

“You aren’t dressed.” I frowned.

“I’m going to town with Damian,” she said, “with your permission of course.” I nodded. “You’ll be wonderful.” She squeezed my hands. I walked down the hallways and then the stairs and stopped in the hall to the mumbles and curtsies.

“Well look at you,” Harran smiled walking up to me. I grinned. “I’m told we’re sitting together.”

“Yes,” I said softly. “If you don’t mind?” I offered my hand and glanced over my shoulder, seeing Eric talking with Duchess Norvine and starting to walk over. I made eye contact with him and he stopped, Harran took my hand.

Interlude: The High Priest

“It’s not unheard of,” Queen Elana of Phania said softly, her husband Daniel frowned, “There have been Chosen boys, your whole bloodline claims the title.” She was watching as her younger brother Raymond was standing on the beach moving waves.

“It’s different,” Daniel said. “Your brother is unsettling, Elana, even The Mothers say so.” She sat down.

“He’ll inherit Tumona,” she said.

“Well, we’re used to Tumona being peculiar,” Daniel smirked. She sighed. “And that doesn’t even address the…other part.”

“If you mean that Raymond likes boys, does it need addressing?” Daniel’s brother Eric was leaning against the door frame. Daniel sighed looking at him.

“Why are you here?” He muttered between clenched teeth.

“Am I supposed to be elsewhere?” Eric asked. “You haven’t sent me anywhere specific, and my mother is here.”

“We’re always happy to see you Eric,” Elana said diplomatically and walked over and kissed him on the cheek.

“Just you?” Daniel said. Eric sighed.

“Lefty opted to stay in the city,” Eric said, “I can’t imagine why, when he always gets such a warm welcome.” He looked down. “I need to talk to him.”

“Raymond?” Daniel said. Eric nodded. “Why?”

“I’ve been having these, feelings,” Eric shrugged, “about her.” Daniel stared at him.

“Who?” Elana said and then paused, “oh, her.” Eric nodded. “Are we sure she’s alive?”

“Reasonably,” Daniel said with a sigh.

“Anyway, I’m going to talk to Raymond about them, and then I will get out of your hair,” he kissed Elana on the cheek wand walked down to the beach. The younger boy looked over at him and smiled. “They’re up there worrying about you.”

“Imagine my shock,” Raymond said, “The Brothers said no again, I’m out of appeals.” Eric nodded.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “You could come on The Glory.” Raymond looked at him. “You hate it here, Raymond, I know that.”

“You had another vision,” Raymond said. Eric rolled his eyes. “What this time?”

“I could just be being nice to you,” Eric pointed out. This time Raymond rolled his eyes. “They aren’t visions, exactly, more like, feelings. Like she’s thinking about me, and I can hear her, and I know she’s just,” he sighed, “waiting.” Raymond nodded. “I don’t know what to do about it, I don’t know where she is, no one does.”

“She’s in Cammadan,” Raymond said, “somewhere green, probably The Midlands.” Eric looked at him. “Rana’s not likely to let us forget she’s out there. I know everyone thinks I’m crazy, but I Dream. And sometimes she’s there.” He sighed. “They found me and Randolph.” Eric exhaled. “They weren’t happy.”

“I’d imagine not,” Eric said. “But, a strong sailor like him, and a seer who knows how to actually do all the stupid ambassador stuff that Daniel is always making me do? That seems valuable from where I stand.” Raymond looked at him. “It’s a big world Raymond. You don’t have to spend your life in a place with people who don’t see you.” Eric looked at him. “If I had to guess, it’s Brightcoast and then Rastan next. We’d be glad to have you along.” He turned and walked back to the palace. Raymond sat on the beach and hugged his knees.

Later that night he took a deep breath and worked his way to the villa on the palace ground where Randolph Eres lived with his parents. He knocked on the door and Randolph opened it.

“Ray,” he said and stepped out onto the porch, “you probably shouldn’t be here.” He shut the door behind us.

“I know you’re technically six months from getting a posting,” Raymond said, “but Eric offered to put us on The Prince’s Glory.” Randolph raised his eyebrows. “I know it isn’t perfect, but we could be together and,” he looked down.

“This is real,” Randolph said, Raymond nodded. “Prince Eric wants us on the ship?” Raymond rolled his eyes and they took each other’s hands and started walking towards the beach.

“Eric likes to feel like the Goddess herself put him here to save people,” Raymond shrugged, “but it’s convenient. We’d go to Rastan and probably Cammadan too.” Randolph smiled and kissed him.

“Cammadan,” Randolph said. Raymond nodded. “We could be together there, really together.”

“I know,” Raymond said, “I could learn magic, real magic not just control like they teach here. And you’d be out of the navy proper, really sailing.”

“Under Prince Eric,” Randolph grinned, “And Damian Lestoff, it doesn’t get better than that.” Raymond glared at him. “He’s not my type, Ray.”

“He’s everyone’s type,” he muttered. Randolph kissed him gently. “You’re sure. I don’t think we can turn back from this.”

“No turning back,” Randolph nodded. “And this way I don’t have to tell my parents yet.” Raymond laughed and they kissed again. “What did your sister say?”

“Very little,” Raymond admitted, “I think if they acknowledged it, then they’d have to you know, acknowledge it, and she won’t.”

“I’m sorry, Ray,” Randolph said softly. “I wish we lived in a better world.” Raymond nodded and they kept walking.

A year later he sat on a dock in Rastan, when Lefty bounced over and sat next to him.

“Have you heard the news?” Lefty said and bumped his shoulder, “We’re off to Cammadan. Eric has to fulfill his destiny and woo Queen Annalise.” Raymond nodded. “You can be Mastero Quents! It’s a reason to celebrate.” Raymond laughed.

“And you’ll get to find out about Cammadie warrior women,” Raymond teased back. He wasn’t great about it yet, but he’d almost gotten the hang of taking the air out of Eric and Lefty’s sails. Lefty laughed. “How is he?”

“Worried,” Lefty said, “It isn’t as thought that’s difficult to understand. If I thought the Gods were genuinely counting on me wooing a girl I’d probably need to be locked in a dark room for a very long time.” Raymond smiled and nodded. “How are you doing?”

“Alright,” he said softly, “it isn’t exactly what I expected.” Lefty nodded.

“You know when Eric told me his plan to bring you on,” he said, “I told him there was no way you’d do it.” Raymond looked at him. “I’ve never been happier to be wrong.”

“Why didn’t you think I’d come?” Raymond asked. Lefty ruffled his hair and shrugged.

“Because you’re the little boy with his books and prayers,” Lefty said, “I can’t help that I’ll always see you that way.” Raymond smiled. “It never made sense to me why The Brothers wouldn’t take you.” Raymond snorted.

“I have this feeling that was always more about my sister,” he muttered. “They don’t like being seen as They Royal Family’s dumping ground.”

“Ah, that,” he grinned, “well, I think Brinecliff would have to challenge them for that particular honor. It is our distinction.” Raymond laughed. “Come on, Eric told Raniere that we’re leaving there’s going to be one last hunt.”

“Great,” Raymond said, “something new and different.” Lefty laughed and stood up, offering him a hand to help him up. He’d been more nervous than anything about spending much time in proximity to Damian Lestoff.

The man was impossibly handsome. And kind and charming. And Raymond felt almost no attraction to him. Being with Lefty and Eric was the easiest thing in the world. He grabbed his hand and pulled up.

It was a few weeks at sea and then a whole one of careful sailing down river to Dovetail’s large dug out harbor when they arrived at what had to be these least opportune moment possible. It was before dawn and they’d missed the coronation.

“It’ll be memorable at least,” Randolph had teased him.

“It’s disrespectful,” Raymond mumbled. “We should have left Rastan earlier.” But there they were, standing on the dock, a girl, who was clearly Phanian, and a boy, tall, and lanky, with reddish hair.

“Not quite the grand welcoming comittee,” Lefty muttered. Eric glared at him. “I’m only saying.”

“Is that her?” Eric said to him. Raymond shrugged. “Alright.” It wasn’t. Instead of was Duchess Marina SanPierre, and her smile was one of the most breathtaking things Raymond had ever seen. She was also, he realized, the most powerful person he had her been the presence of, and that included the High Mother of Vacana.

“I am very glad that’s over,” Eric said flopping on a couch in the richly appointed apartment they’d been sent to. Lefty was staring dreamily out the window and Raymond wrinkled his forehead. “You’re worried.”

“No,” he shook his head, “they’re powerful. Did you feel it?” Eric nodded, Raymond was glad of that. Eric wasn’t very gifted, but he had some intuition that pointed towards it. “The Duchess especially, astounding.” Lefty looked over at us.

“She is, isn’t she?” He said and sighed walking back over. “Did you see those eyes?”

“I don’t think Raymond is talking about the same thing, Lefty,” Eric said. “But yes, even I could feel how powerful she is and I don’t have your insights, and she’s very beautiful too.” He stopped. “They both are.”

“You have the queen, leave something for the rest of us,” Lefty said kicking Eric.

“I don’t have her,” Eric mumbled, “but knock yourself out with The Duchess. I have to go see about the crew.” He stood up and walked out.

“What are you going to do?” Lefty said, Raymond sighed.

“I should probably go to the temple,” he said. “We had a safe voyage. She likes to be thanked. Want to come?”

“To the temple?” He said. “And get drowned in my sleep for trouble, no thank you.” He kicked back. Raymond rolled his eyes and stood up. “Raymond,” he said, “is she dangerous?” he swallowed.

“I don’t know,” he said softly. “She’s powerful, but it doesn’t feel dark.” Lefty nodded and he left, asking the guards for directions to The Temple of Rana.

The walk was distracting, he kept noticing things, the kinds of things he’d never see on the street in Vacana. Two women being chased by a little boy shouting, “Mamas!” at them, a merchant boy handing another boy walking into an inn a flower. He entered the temple and was greeted by a Sister.

“You’re a stranger here,” she said with a kind and giving voice. He nodded. “I’m Sister Anya, welcome.”

“Thank you,” he said. At home he was one of only a few men welcome in the Temple at all. To be welcomed as a stranger felt exceedingly odd. “My name is Sir Raymond Quents, I’m a companion to The Prince of Phania, we just arrived I wanted to thank The Goddess for the safe voyage.” Sister Anya’s lips turned up in a smile.

“Of course,” she said, “there are several salt basins available.” She gestured to the alcoves surrounding the circular center of the temple. He nodded, mumbled a thank you and he went to a Salt Basin and gently waved his hands over it before losing consciousness.

“Oh well done!” A dark skinned woman was standing in front of him. “Really, you didn’t waste any time.”

“My Lady,” He nodded sagely. “Thank you for,” she waved her hands dismissively.

“Yes, yes, safe voyage,” The Goddess Rana sighed, “as if I would imperil my Sword’s Future Husband and one my own.” He blinked at her.

“If I’m Chosen then why,” he drifted off.

“Was it what you wanted,” she said softly, “to be a monk, shunted away and alone?” He swallowed. “I brought you home, Raymond. And I ask only that you stand at the side of My Sword.” He nodded.

“I will,” he said softly. She smiled gently at him. A smile that somehow reminded him of his mother and sister, but with more love and less indulgence.

“I haven’t had a High Priest in a while,” she said, “it might be fun.” He then lost consciousness again and came to, still standing at The Salt Basin in the temple. He closed his eyes and exhaled, realizing his life in Cammadan just got very very complicated.

Interlude: The Two Lovers

Mercy Graves hurried quickly through the courtyard in the palace of Dovetail to the hedgemaze and through it to the center, where sitting calmly and serenely was Lady Marina Sanpierre. She was moving her hands over the water of the salt pond and it was rippling and rising up in small waves.

Marina was the closest thing to a friend Mercy had. There weren’t many people their age at the palace who weren’t in the guard. But she was also in awe of The Little Duchess. She was so small, and yet contained so much power. And she was beautiful, with her brown skin, and curled hair and quiet smile that so few people ever got to see.

Mercy knew that Marina would probably be Queen some day. Whether crowned in her own right because Princess Annalise was long dead, or as consort to Lord Brayton. It was good for her to be near her. Their friendship was productive. At least that’s what her father said.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” she said. Marina looked over at her. “They’ve asked everyone to come to the hall.” Marina sighed.

“Oh, alright,” she said, “do you know why?” Mercy shook her head. Marina slid her arm through Mercy’s and they walked through the hallways. Mercy felt an electricity shoot through her.

“Something’s happened,” Marina said and slid her arm out and she started looking around. “No, they aren’t here.” Mercy swallowed and realized what, who, Marina meant.

The Dugarrys. General Thomas Martin.

“Lady Marina,” a girl from the guard walked over to her. She wasn’t a soldier, though, she was in blue not green. She was a healer. “Sir Tristan went to see his Uncle. He said to tell you that he’d see you at dinner.” She nodded.

“Thank you,” she said softly. “Is he,” she swallowed. “He’s alright?” Mercy rolled her eyes.

“He’s alright,” the healer girl said. “Lady Athena too. The General has been exiled.” Marina nodded.

“I should find my father,” she whispered. “Are you alright?” Mercy nodded.

“Of course,” she said, “always.” Marina squeezed her hands and disappeared into the crowd. The healer looked at her awkwardly. “That was kind of you. She worries about him.”

“He worries about her,” the guard girl smirked. “I don’t think either of them realize why though.” Mercy giggled. “I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Elodie.”

“Mercy,” she said and shook her hand. “You’re a healer, so you have magic?”

“Some,” Elodie said and they started walking. “Mostly though it just makes me better at my job. I can perceive things and move medicine through the body.” Mercy nodded. “What about you? You’re always with Lady Marina, do you have,”

“Oh no,” Mercy interrupted her, “no.” Elodie nodded. “We’re just friends, or friendly really.” She was blushing, she realized.

“Alright,” Elodie smiled. Someone called her name, “Duty calls.” Mercy nodded. “It was nice meeting you.”

“You too,” Mercy said as Elodie bounced away. Mercy swallowed, her throat dry. Only Marina had ever given her butterflies like that before. Surely it was because Elodie also had magic.

Elodie looked back over her shoulder at Mercy and smiled. She was pretty, with her red hair and her overly fashionable gown. She glanced around and notice Lady Athena standing with her fiance, Warren Davis. Davis was holding Athena’s face in his hands and she was nodding. Elodie swallowed and walked over to her.

“I’m so sorry my love,” she heard Davis say. “But you understand?”

“Of course,” she said softly and kissed him. “Go, I’m sure you have work to do.” He nodded and walked away. Elodie saw her friend’s face change to one of blind rage.

“Do we know it was him?” Elodie asked. Athena nodded. “I’m sorry, My Lady.”

“I know,” she said softly. “So is Tristan, and Martin. Everyone’s sorry, even Warren.” She sighed. “You may have to go to Camp. Are you ready?”

“I think so,” Elodie nodded. “It’s been a while. I’ve gotten used to things here, but change is always good.” Athena laughed darkly. “Lady Athena, if you need anything, please let me know.”

“I’m alright,” Athena said and walked out quietly. Elodie frowned and sighed walking out to the barracks. She flopped onto her bed and closed her eyes trying to sleep. But sleep didn’t come. She got up and quickly walked outside to the main courtyard.

There was some whispering from the people around but it was mostly silent. The barracks had been breached, Thomas Martin was branded a traitor. Nothing made sense.

Elodie frowned as she saw the moonlight streaming through the trees and saw Mercy sitting. Then she smiled in spite of herself. She’d always kept her distance from Court Ladies. They reminded her of the wealthy merchant daughters who came into her father’s inn when she was little, all softness and beauty disguising sharp edges and sadness.

But Athena wasn’t like that. She often reminded herself. And Athena was both, a noble lady and a wealthy merchant daughter in addition to the fiercest warrior in Cammadan. Still, Elodie made most of her friends in the guard and healer corp.

“We don’t have to choose,” Athena had shrugged, once when Elodie had asked her. “I’m not just one thing. No one needs to be.”

She walked over and Mercy looked at her and smiled shyly.

“Is it alright if I sit?” Elodie said. Mercy nodded and she sat. “It’s been a trying day.”

“I’m sure,” Mercy said softly. “My father says it’s a glorious one, traitors don’t deserve our sympathy.” Her hands were balled in her skirt.

“General Martin would sooner cut off his own head than betray Cammadan,” Elodie said defensively. Mercy looked at her. “I don’t mean to contradict you,” she said, “he’s been very good to me.” Mercy looked at her.

“I think my father is very afraid,” she said softly. “And he thinks Lord Brayton is safe.” Elodie nodded.

“And what do you think?” She asked. Mercy looked at her surprised, as thought no one had asked her that before. “You’re close with Lady Marina, aren’t you? Surely, that’s safer.”

“Marina isn’t,” Mercy stopped. “There aren’t that many other people to talk to. Besides which, she’s going to be Queen. Surely you’ve seen how Lord Brayton looks at her.” Elodie grimaced. They all saw how Brayton looked at The Duchess, like she was a skittish animal for him to tame and conquer. It was unsettling. “She’s lucky.”

“Do you really believe that?” Elodie asked. Mercy swallowed and looked at the healer.

She didn’t. Well, she believed Marina was lucky, because she was beautiful, had a father who loved her, friends like Tristan Dugarry and powerful magic. But not because of the attention Brayton gave her.

“I don’t know,” Mercy admitted softly. Elodie nodded and they locked eyes. “I wish you’d stop looking at me like that.” Mercy said.

“I’m not looking at you any way in particular,” Elodie said softly, and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear but then turned her gaze away. Then both girls laughed. “I like you.” Mercy looked at her. “You don’t have to say anything, but well, it’s not something a person hears everyday, so,” Mercy smiled blushed, turned to her and kissed her gently.

“I like you too.” Mercy said. Elodie smiled and they pulled close. She smelled good, like flowers and something sweet, and she was so soft. Mercy’s hands were tangled in her hair keeping them close, as Elodie slid her hands onto her waist. “I don’t normally do this,” Mercy whispered when they stopped for breath.

“You’re good at it for someone who doesn’t normally do it,” Elodie grinned.

The next few motnhs, Mercy found herself more often than not in Elodie’s small room in the barracks at night. She’d lied to her father, saying that she’d been asked to wait on Lady Marina, which of course thrilled him. She knew he’d never approve of Elodie, who was working class and firmly in the Anti-Brayton camp of officers.

But Mercy thought she was amazing. That night she giggled as they kissed pushing gently against one another.

“I want you,” Elodie said softly. Mercy smiled coyly and rolled onto her back. Elodie laughed and straddled her. “You’re too beautiful,” she mumbled.

“Do you want me or not?” She said and pulled Elodie’s shift over her head. The door opened then they both heard a throat clear and a low laugh.

“Lieutenant,” Lady Athena Dugarry was leaning against the door. “Mistress Graves.”

“Lady Athena,” Mercy said with an eyeroll, pulling her clothes back on.

“Elodie, I need to speak to you.” Athena said. “If you aren’t too busy.”

“Of course not,” Elodie said. “Mercy, I’m sorry.” Mercy held up her hands and kissed Elodie on her way out. “Knocking, a novel concept, My Lady.” Athena snorted.

“I don’t know what you see in her, but I am sorry I interrupted,” Athena sat down.

“I don’t know what you see in half the men you’re with so we’re even there,” Elodie sighed. “What is it?”

“Um, you’re being asked to help escort Lady Marina to Camp,” Athena said, “I chose you for the assignment Elodie, I don’t trust anyone else.” Elodie closed her eyes. A few months ago this would have been the best thing to ever happen to her. But that was before Mercy.

“Why aren’t you doing it?” She asked. Athena sighed.

“Tristan and I are escorting Countess Olivia home,” she mumbled. Elodie bit her bottom lip. Of course. Athena had leaked crucial Resistance details to Warren Davis. She’d be given lower priority missions right now. “Are you up for it?” Elodie nodded.

“What’s the cover story?” Elodie asked softly. Athena sighed.

“She’s going home,” Athena said, “to Brightcoast. To study with the sisters there.”

“You’re going?” Mercy said when they met up in the garden the next day. Elodie nodded. “But why, you’re a healer, not a guard.”

“I’m both,” Elodie said, “and studying with the sisters in Brightcoast is a big opportunity for me.” Mercy swallowed and plopped down on the bench. “I’m sorry, Mercy, it is only for a few months, though, I’ll be back.” Mercy turned her head to look away.

“It’s fine,” she said, “go, it doesn’t matter.” Elodie nodded and sat down with her. She pushed her hair to the side and rested her head on her shoulder. “I love you Elodie.”

“I love you too,” Elodie whispered.

Sitting in Camp after victory hadn’t been what Elodie was expecting. The Twins were with the Pantonas and Princess Annalise. And all she could think about was if Mercy had been evacuated. She took a deep breath and walked into the command tent.

“General,” she said softly, “do you know where the evacuees were taken?” Martin smiled at her. “There’s someone I should find.”

“Of course,” he said. They walked through the celebrating camp. “We can’t know if she left, Captain Willis.” Elodie swallowed, the new title felt awkward.

“I know,” she said, “if I have to find her in the city tomorrow I will, but,” she trailed off. She quickly scanned around the group of tents and the chaos of this area. It wasn’t organized like resistance camp. But she checked each fire until finally seeing Mercy sitting with her father, warming her hands. She made eye contact and smiled and stood up quickly running over to her and throwing her arms around her neck and kissing her.

“I knew it,” Mercy said through tears, “oh I knew you’d be here!” Elodie kept kissing her all over her face and laughing. “Elodie, is it true?”

“What part?” She swallowed and pulled back and looked at her.

“That Princess Annalise is here,” she said. Elodie nodded. “Gods,” Mercy exhaled. “Have you met her?”

“Yes,” Elodie said, “and I got promoted. I’m a Captain now.” Mercy laughed and stroked her face. “And I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you,” she whispered. “It’s crowded here,” she wrinkled her nose. Elodie laughed and took her hand and led her to the main camp.

“Elodie,” Marina walked out of the medical tent, “Mercy! Goddess!” She hugged her tightly. “Oh I’m glad you’re safe!” Mercy laughed and Elodie shrugged. “Oh! How silly of me. You two enjoy yourselves.” She winked and headed off.

“She seems,” Mercy cocked her head to side, “well different, I guess.”

“She’s changed a lot,” Elodie said as they walked into her tent. “You haven’t,” Mercy laughed and they kissed again falling back against the cot.

“You don’t know that,” Mercy giggled and then sighed as Elodie’s lips slipped to her neck. “I could have changed a lot.” Elodie laughed and unbuttoned her guard jacket.

“You still like that though,” Elodie whispered, sliding Mercy’s skirts up around her thighs. Mercy cooed happily. “And this,” she said and kissed her while sliding her hand inside of her.

“Mm,” she whispered, “yes, I do.”

After they’d finished Elodie buried her face in Mercy’s hair. That same smell from that first night in the garden, flowers and something sweet.

“Never go away for that long again,” Mercy whispered. Elodie smiled.

“If I do, you’re coming with me,” she said softly. Mercy smiled.

“That’s something I can definitely do,” she said, “I love you.” Elodie pressed her forehead to Mercy’s.

“I love you.”

Interlude: The Triangle: Part 2

Content Warning: This story contains references to and descriptions of Domestic Child Abuse. If you are aware of or suffering from Child Abuse, please contact your state CPS, (A list of United States CPS Agencies can be found at childwelfare.gov) or if you are in crisis contact the Crisis Text Line at 741-741

7 Years Before Crowning

Tom was pacing in the parlor, unsure what to do next. Trey was simply staring at him.

“Should we wake them up?” Tom asked. Trey shook his head.

“Let them sleep one more night not knowing,” he whispered. “Gods, my father, he’ll want them in Dorin.”

“They can’t go to Dorin,” Tom said, “Trey, Alexia made me swear, that they wouldn’t be pulled off the guard path. And besides which, they’re as much Dugarry as they are Dumanis. Dugarrys are in The Guard.” Trey frowned. “They can live here, can’t they?”

“Here?” Trey said. “Not the palace?”

“The Palace is no place from children these days,” Tom said, “I can’t even think, I need to,” he swallowed, “if he knew, if they knew, Trey, I have to go to Pantona.”

“I’m sure they have it under control,” Trey stood up. Tom looked at him. “She’ll send word, she always does.” Tom nodded but something felt wrong. John and Alexia were dead and had been for nearly a week and there hadn’t been word from Olivia. “We have to focus on the twins, you’re right about that. Athena is headstrong and stubborn already, and Tristan is sullen and quiet, without their parents, without their mission,” Tom’s heart suddenly broke, seeing his partner’s attempt to be strong. Trey had been close to his sister. He pulled him close.

“I know,” he whispered, “but I still have to,” he sighed. “I’m sorry,” he whispered and left quickly. He rode fast, through the flat land, stopping only to change horses and drink and eat a little, but he arrived at Pantona withing a few days.

“Tom,” Olivia exclaimed as he burst into the hall, she ran down the stairs and into his arms. “Oh I’m so glad to see you, we were so worried, is it true?” He nodded and burst into tears finally. She pressed her face into his chest. “Poor John, and Alexia,” she swallowed, “oh and those children, Tom, are they with you? Do you need,” he shook his head.

“They’re with Trey,” he said softly. She nodded and they walked into another room and sat down. “But you’re safe?” He cupped a hand against her cheek.

“Yes,” she said softly. “As is my son, and,” she stopped as a little girl came running in. “Lisette, please give us a moment.”

“Of course, Countess,” she said and curtsied gently, “sir,” she whispered to him and then pitterred out.

“Gods,” he whispered, “it’s like seeing a ghost.” Olivia smiled softly. “But you haven’t seen anything? No one has come or reached out?”

“No,” she said softly, “we’re safe.” He exhaled. “Your probably passed my husband on the road, he was going to make sure the twins and Lady Marina were safe.” He smiled. He’d never expected to grow fond of Caleb Pantona, but he had over the years. “Trey won’t be happy you came here.”

“Because it’s you?” Tom said. Olivia laughed.

“Partly,” she said, “and partly because she was his sister.” He nodded. “You must be exhausted, I’ll get a room set for you. Do you want to see the children?”

“No,” he said, “I’ll sleep and get back. You’re right, he’ll be furious.” She laughed and he touched her face gently, “I just had to see you, I couldn’t,” he choked on some tears. She nodded.

“I know,” she said softly, “I was frantic too, it’s why Caleb went. I can’t, but well,” he nodded and then kissed her softly. “Tom,” she whispered and pulled back, “no.” He sighed and looked down. “I’m sorry, I thought you understood.”

“No, I do, I shouldn’t have,” he sighed, “it would be easier, sometimes, if I didn’t. Then I could have gone on being angry at you.” She smiled and took his hands. “I wish so badly that I didn’t love you anymore, Livvie.”

“Oh, Tom,” she sighed, “I don’t think you do. I think you loved me when I was seventeen, and you love that idea. I love it too. There are plenty of times when I wonder, if,” she sighed, “we’ll always have a maybe, between us. But you have Trey, and now you have to be there for Tristan and Athena. They’re wonderful children, but this will be so hard on them.” He took her hand again and kissed it gently.

“No,” he whispered, “it’s not the idea of it, but that’s there, I love you, I think I always will.” She nodded.

“Mother,” a boy walked in, he was clearly awkwardly between boyhood and manhood, but tall, a little gangly. Tom hadn’t seen Aaron Pantona since he was a small child. The resemblance to Caleb was obvious, but there was more of Olivia in his face than he’d realized. “Lisette said we had a guest, I thought I should say hello.” Olivia sent him a crooked smile.

“Of course,” she said, “General Thomas Martin, may I present my son, Viscount Aaron Pantona.” The small Viscount bowed and Tom smiled.

“Your Grace,” Tom said standing up and extending his hand. Aaron took it and shook it enthusiastically. “If you’ll both excuse me, I think I ought to go to the inn.”

After arriving back in Dovetail, Tom walked into the house and was immediately blindsided by a tumble of blonde curls tackling his stomach.

“Where were you?” Athena Dugarry looked up at him, her green eyes flashing in anger. “Aunt Brie said we have to go to Dorin and I won’t! They can’t make me. I know that we can’t stay at the palace anymore with Mama and Papa gone, but I won’t go to Dorin!”

“Thena,” he sighed, “you do not have to go to Dorin. Where is your brother?” Tristan was sitting at the dining table and looked up at him. “Come along, and sit,” Athena obeyed, though she looked unhappy about it. The twins identical faces and hair, so like John’s, looked back at him. “I want you both to know first of all that you will always be safe. I won’t let any harm come to you.”

“We know that, Sir,” Trsitan managed, “but we don’t want to leave Dovetail, we told Uncle Trey that and,” he swallowed what was likely a very large sob.

“Good,” he whispered. “And Tristan, Athena,” he took one hand each, “I need you to be brave, I swore to your mother that I would take care of you and I take it very seriously. I’m going to speak to your grandfather and settle things. You are not going to Dorin, not if you don’t want it, and if you do want it, you won’t go without me.” He stood up and Tristan joined him and hugged him tightly. After releasing the boy he saw Trey waiting in the hall.

“How is she?” He asked.

“Coping,” Tom said softly, “thank you, for not just sending them.” Trey shrugged. “I know it’s hard for you to stand against your family Trey, I’m always grateful.” Trey nodded.

“You were right that it wouldn’t be what Alexia and John would want,” Trey said. “Caleb Pantona talked me out of it. He pointed out it would play into Brayton’s hands, and that you’d never forgive me for it.” They both laughed. “I loved my sister Tom, I love you, I couldn’t do something that would cause you so much pain.”

“I know that,” he said, “I shouldn’t have run off, it isn’t fair to you, to them, to whatever it is we’ve had for the past twelve years.” Trey smiled. “But there’s something in me, Trey, I love you, but whenever something goes wrong, in my guts, it’s her.”

“I’ve noticed,” Trey muttered. Tom frowned. “It can’t be like that now. Not with Athena and Tristan with us.” He nodded.

1 Year Before Coronation

“What do you mean she won’t go?” Brie DuCray exclaimed. Trey sighed. “She’s sixteen, she’s a member of this family, she will go to Dorin and be presented.”

“Brie,” Trey said, “if I had any measure of control over Athena don’t you think she’d be in this house rather than in the barracks and I wouldn’t be arguing that she shouldn’t marry that idiotic Davis boy.”

“She’s not marrying him,” Brie said, “Goddess, Father would lose his mind. We can do better.” She sat down. “Alex is cooling on the DuKarras girl.”

“No,” Trey said. “That won’t help anyone.” Brie frowned and the door burst open, Tristan walked in, his face red and flustered. “Tristan this is not a good time.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, “Hello Aunt Brie.” She nodded at him. “I just, the Black Guards came to the Barracks.” Trey walked over and took his shoulders. “I’m fine, Athena is fine.” Brie looked at her brother.

“Why were they there?” Trey said. “Tristan?” He swallowed.

“Martin’s been exiled,” he said. Brie closed her eyes and exhaled. “They know he’s leading the Resistance.”

“Living Gods,” Brie whispered. “But you two?” Tristan shook his head. “I have to tell Drea.” Trey nodded and Brie left. Tristan swallowed.

“He got away safely?” Trey whispered. Tristan nodded. “And you and your sister are both alright?”

“Yes,” Tristan said and collapsed. “He told me to come to you, well, us, but Athena,” Trey stopped.

“Davis?” He said. Tristan nodded. “Goddess.” Trey muttered. “I need to see him.”

“He’s gone already,” Tristan said, “he gave me a letter.” He handed it over.

“Where did he go?” Trey asked. Tristan shrugged. “You don’t know?”

“We’re too close to Brayton these days,” Tristan said, “I don’t know where Camp is. But I’m sure it was to Camp.” Trey nodded.

“Why are you so close to Brayton these days?” Trey asked. “Surely there are more useful places for you to be.” And safer. He thought to himself.

“We need to stay close,” Tristan said quietly, “Lady Marina, well.” Trey sighed. He’d seen though never met the “Little Duchess” as she was called. And Tristan talked about the girl enough. “He’s taken an interest in her.”

“I see,” Trey frowned. “It’s a practical move. Brightcoast is large territory. And she’s the heir, after The Princess.” Tristan nodded. “Don’t stay too long, if they’re looking for you, you should be wherever you’re supposed to be.” Tristan nodded and Trey hugged him close. “Stay safe, my boy, please. I couldn’t take it,”

“I know,” Tristan whispered and left swiftly. Trey opened the letter.


Know that no matter what comes next for me, I will love you always. Please look after them while I’m gone. I can’t stand the idea of the three of you alone.



Coronation Ball

Countess Olivia Pantona smiled sadly looking over the goings on at the large ball. They were so young, and there was so much still to be done.

“Countess,” Trey Dumanis walked over to her holding two glasses of sparkling wine. “If you’ll permit me.” She smiled and took it.

“Thank you, Master Dumanis,” she said softly. “I understand we owe you some thanks. It all would have been more difficult without you.” He smiled and looked down.

“You know better than most,” he said, “how difficult it is to say no.” She smiled. “I am sorry about your husband. Caleb was a good man.” She swallowed and nodded.

“Yes he was,” she said and nodded towards Aaron who was dancing with a laughing Athena. “It seems we’re going to be family soon.”

“Yes,” he said, “my father couldn’t be happier.” She laughed.

“I can imagine,” she said, “he may find Aaron less pliable than he’d like however. Like a good country boy he has a skeptical view of The Guilds. He’s seen a few tenants get fleeced.” Trey smiled.

“Of course,” he said and glanced across at where Tom was standing. “It’s strange, having him back.” Olivia smiled at him coyly.

“Is he back?” She raised her eyebrows. Trey looked at her. “I am in mourning, Tristan, you have nothing to fear from me.”

“Olivia, you were married for thirty years and it didn’t matter to him,” Trey shook his head. She sighed. “I know you never encouraged him, it’s only, I spent most of my life in second place. I can’t keep at it until I die.” She nodded and raised her eyebrow again.

“You didn’t answer the question,” she smiled.

“He was,” he admitted, “just the once.” She giggled happily. “You’re behaving like a child, by the way, not a dignified dowager.”

“With Alexia gone, someone needs to tease you, your other sisters have always been useless at it,” she said. He smiled. “I never wanted to be between you two.”

“I know that,” Trey said softly. “You still are though.” She nodded.


The burial had been harder than Tom expected, though he remained in awe of Olivia, she’d barely cried. He thought back to the night in camp, when he’d stopped himself from going to her, despite hearing her wailing. It’s why he’d come today even if it was not the most sound judgement.

Tenants had been coming in and out of the manor all day, and now it was quiet, he, Les and Olivia sat quietly in the parlor. Aaron had gone to the study with William Santino, “getting hideously drunk, most likely,” Livvie had said mischievously.

“You’re sure of that?” Les asked. She sighed and put her feet up on ottoman.

“It is the usual outcome when Aaron and William spend any amount of time together,” she said with a soft smile. Tom looked at her. “Granted it isn’t usually here, it’s at the inn, but still.”

“Why not here?” Tom asked. She sighed.

“Caleb didn’t really approve,” she said, “not of William, he liked him, but of Aaron’s, other activities in the area.”

“Farm girls,” Les laughed, “kitchen maids,” Olivia nodded. “The odd merchant girl if I recall correctly.”

“Precisely,” Olivia sighed. “No man will respect a lord who’s bedded his and half his neighbor’s wives.” Tom snorted. “He was so happy about Athena, Tom, really.”

“I know,” Tom said softly. “We’re happy too, really. But I worry about her, she can be rash.” Les smiled softly.

“She’ll settle,” he said, “all of them have endured so much. I hope peace suits them.” He paused. “I hope it suits us at that.” Olivia reached out and took his hand and squeezed it. “I think I need to sleep. Thank you for this, Livvie. It helped.”

“I’m glad,” she said, “I know I’m not Caleb, but I am here.” He smiled and nodded at Tom before leaving. “He might miss him more than I do.”

“He’s always been sentimental,” Tom said, “and being so isolated these past sixteen years couldn’t have helped.” She nodded and he walked over to her. “Do you miss him?”

“Yes,” she said. “I think I will more now, it’s been so busy.” She stretched. “But he’s at rest, and Aaron will be married and I can rest, and see my grandchildren when they come.” She sighed and looked at him. “You will be here?” She asked. He looked at her.

“If I’m wanted,” he said.

“Athena will want you here,” she said softly. He smiled.

“That isn’t what I meant,” he said, “and you know it.” She sighed and stood up, he took her hand as she passed him. “Livvie,” he whispered.

“Tom,” she sighed. “This isn’t what I thought would happen,” he nodded. “What about Trey?”

“There isn’t anything with Trey,” he said. She frowned. “I thought, maybe we could try again, but there’s too much hurt, too much change.”

“Oh,” she looked away. “And if I’m not ready?” He nodded.

“I understand,” he said, “but are you not ready, or not interested?” She looked at him and sighed and knelt down between his legs and pressed her forehead to his.

“I love you,” she said, “I’ve always loved you. It’s changed and grown so much.” He inhaled. “I can’t lose you too, Tom. It would be too much to bear. Anton and Marie and Anne and Alexia and John and then Caleb. If we try this and it doesn’t work out,” she swallowed. “I can’t lose you.”

“You won’t lose me,” he said softly, “don’t you think you would have be now?” She kissed him and pulled close. He lifted her up by the waist and carried her upstairs to her room.

When they’d finished and lay quietly together Tom gently traced a few scars on her back. They were new, or at least new to him. They hadn’t been there when they were young.

“What are these from?” He asked. She rolled over.

“My father,” she said softly. He stared at her. “It started just hitting me when I was disappointing, but when Anton announced his engagement, I required serious correction,” he exhaled.

“How didn’t I know?” He asked.

“I hid it,” she said, “I was embarrassed. Anton didn’t know either. John did. Caleb guessed, it was how we became close at first.” She exhaled. “It was a long time ago.” He kissed her deeply.

“You didn’t trust me?” He asked.

“No,” she sighed. “It’s hard to explain, I trusted you, but I also didn’t think you would accept my weakness. Of course it wasn’t mine, it was his, but,” she sighed. “When I lost my first baby,” she said, “I was terrified that Caleb would hate me, too, the same way my father did. But he was always so kind, and gentle.” Tom swallowed.

“How may were there?” He asked. “I remember the two others you carried.” She sighed.

“Five,” she said, “three before Aaron, two after. The two who died in their cradles, Mara and Joseph, they were the hardest. The others never even quickened, poor things.” She looked at him. “Do you regret not having children?” She asked. He laughed.

“Sometimes,” he said, “but I have the twins.” She nodded. “But if you mean do I regret spending my life with Trey, I don’t think I ever could, unless of course it meant I got to spend it with you.” She cooed softly and kissed him. “Did you know Annalise asked me if I was in love with Anton?” Olivia burst out in a laugh.

“Really?” She said. He nodded. “Were you? I feel like I would have noticed, I was very jealous. Of both of you.” He grinned.

“No,” he said, “I loved him, and if he’d wanted me I don’t think I could have denied him, but it was never that way.” She nodded. “Besides, I only had eyes for you for quite a while.” She smiled. “What do we do now?”

“Is it alright if we don’t know?” She asked. “I have a wedding to plan, and the gods knows what’s happening with Lisette.” He laughed.

“I sent Tristan into the Lion’s Den,” he muttered, “because the gods knows what’s happening with Lisette.” She laughed. “And I’m in no rush to explain it to Trey.” She smiled and they kissed again before snuggling into one another and falling asleep

Interlude: The Triangle: Part 1

Content Warning: This story contains references to and descriptions of Domestic Child Abuse. If you are aware of or suffering from Child Abuse, please contact your state CPS, (A list of United States CPS Agencies can be found at childwelfare.gov) or if you are in crisis contact the Crisis Text Line at 741-741

30 Years Before Annalise Is Crowned


“What do you think of her?” Olivia Bano said, sitting in the corner of the reception room as Marie SanPierre, the new girl from Phania was standing dear the Royal Family’s dais talking to Prince Anton.

“I think you are much prettier than she is,” John Dugarry said quickly.

“I have you too well trained,” she narrowed her eyes at him. He shrugged. “Look at how Anton is looking at her.” She sighed.

“Your father isn’t here you don’t need to pretend,” John said inspecting his nails. “Run along and make love with Tom in a closet or whatever it is you two have been up to for the past few months, I have to make sure this Phanian girl isn’t carrying poison.” She whacked him in the arm. “Ow!”

“How did you know about Tom and me?” She hissed. He laughed.

“It is the worst kept secret at court, Livvie,” he said. She frowned. “Before you ask of course Anton knows.” She sighed. “You didn’t really want to be Queen?”

“No” she said, and then sighed, “I mean a little, but it’s Anton, every time he touched me I just wanted to giggle and not in the good way.” John snorted.

“I can see that,” he said. “Your father doesn’t know.” She inhaled and looked at him. “But he’ll figure it out soon Livvie.”

“And I will handle it,” she said. He sighed. “I will. I always do.”

“I won’t cover for you this time,” he said. She looked down. “Anton won’t stand for it. Tom won’t.” He swallowed. “I shouldn’t.” He looked down. She stared daggers at him.

“He is my father,” she said. “He loves me and wants what is best for me.”

“What’s best for you is not both you eyes blacked and not being able to sit down for a week,” John said. She frowned. “Come to Dorin with Tom and me. You can enlist in the guard!” She rolled her eyes.

“I am not joining the guard and I am not leaving court to go to Dorin,” she said. “I’ve never understood this obsession of yours.”

“I am marrying according to my family’s cultural traditions,” he said. “And also I like Alexia, from her letters.” Olivia shrugged.

“If you say so,” she said.

“Lady Olivia,” A tall young man with auburn hair almost the same as hers walked past. “Sir John.”

“Viscount,” she blushed and curtsied gently. John bowed and then scowled at her. “Are you very happy that Lord Lestat has returned?”

“I have missed him,” Caleb Pantona nodded. “And his sister is a lovely girl, don’t you think?”

“Oh, I haven’t gotten to speak to her yet,” she giggled. “But I look forward to getting to know her.” The Viscount smiled and moved along.

“What was that?” John asked staring at her.

“Nothing,” she said and pushed her hair behind her ears. “He asked my father for permission to court me. It’s very common out in the country apparently.”

I didn’t mean the Viscount panting at you, trust me I recalll that. ” he said, “I meant you encouraging it.” She rolled her eyes.

“Lady Olivia,” Tom Martin, his dark blonde hair cropped short and his guard uniform crisp. Olivia melted as they met eyes.

“Captain Martin,” she smiled. “John.”

“Trouble,” John muttered and took a big gulp of his drink as they took one another’s hands and slipped away. “Both of you.” Olivia stuck her tongue out at him as they slipped away into an empty room. He pulled her close and kissed her.

“Don’t go to Dorin,” she whispered. He laughed.

“It won’t change anything,” he said softly, “and I gave John my word.” She nodded. “I’m in love with you, Livvie.” She smiled.

“So stay with me,” she said. He kissed her again. “Please.” He sighed and slipped his hand through her hair.

“I promised,” he said softly. “Besides which, you have other commitments too.” She looked down.

“If you mean Anton and me, it isn’t anything,” she said. “I want you, I’ve only ever loved you.” He smiled and kissed her and she drew him back to a couch.

“I only love you too,” he said softly. She swallowed and nodded. She didn’t know if she believed him. Tom’s love felt unsettled. But his touch, and kiss were intoxicating, the feeling of him inside of her too good. And he was Tom.

He was handsome and brave and kind and adored her. Her father wouldn’t be happy, he wanted a grand match for her. But she would figure it out.


Tom was trying not to laugh as John paced back and forth in the very large and ornate receiving room of the Dumanis House in Dovetail.

“I think the summer palace is smaller than this room,” Tom said. John glared at him. “Your in laws, are clearly wealthy, congratulations.”

“You’re supposed to be helping me,” John groaned, “this is not helpful.”

“Sorry,” Tom said, “how can I help? I could ask Jeremy to sell a farm so that I can give you a proper gift.” John looked at him and laughed.

“I am in so over my head,” he groaned. “Have you heard from Livvie?” Tom nodded.

“Mm,” he nodded, “Anton is in love with Marie Sanpierre. She is devastated.”

“I’m sure,” John said.

“Drea, what exactly is the big emergency,” a boy about their age bound into the room. Tom stared at him. He let out a laugh from his throat, “you’re not Drea.”

“No,” Tom said and stood up, “I’m Tom Martin this um,”

“John Dugarry,” The boy sighed, “I forgot that you were coming today. I’m Tristan DuManis, Trey, they call me Trey.” John nodded.

“Nice to meet you,” John said, “is your sister coming? Anytime soon?”

“Lexi?” Trey said. “Did you let her know you were coming about six hours ago?” Tom laughed.

“Trey,” a girl walked in, “stop it.” John looked over at her. Tom smiled, “I’m sorry for keeping you waiting, my father, and my sisters,” she exhaled. “I’m Alexia.”

“John,” Tom said, seeing his friend standing slack jawed. She was beautiful. Blonde hair and green eyes, and she was dressed in a green gown that was clearly designed to invoke the guard uniform. A nice touch. “This is the part where you talk.” Trey laughed from the corner and Tom smiled at him.

“I’m John,” he said softly, “and it’s nice to finally meet you.” She smiled.

“And this is the part where we leave,” Trey stood up. “Good luck.” Tom laughed and followed him out. “She hasn’t eaten in a week.”

“He may have caused more damage to his weapons than good with how much he was cleaning them on the ride,” Tom shook his head. “I suppose you’re next?”

“For the marriage market?” Trey asked. Tom shrugged. “No, I’m not,” he shook his head. “I don’t, not with girls, anyway, and the contracts don’t really allow for,” Tom smiled.

“I understand,” he said. “And it’s good to know.” Trey smiled back at him.

“I should let my father know that I’m here,” Trey said pointing in the general direction fo the hall. “Nice meeting you.” He walked away.

“You too,” Tom smiled. Then he exhaled. “What am I doing?” He mumbled.


“So that’s it then?” Tom stared at Olivia, “you’re going to marry him, throw it all away?”

“Throw what away?” She said calmly, her brown eyes full of tears. “Throw away you and Anton glaring at each other over dinner, while everyone pretends not to notice? Except he’s moved on too. Throw away you spending most of your time with Trey Dumanis and acting like I don’t notice the way you look at each other.” He looked away. “Throw away you leaving for six months? I love you, I do,” she whispered, “but you were gone.”

“Your father must be pleased,” he muttered. One last arrow, the only one left. She swallowed.

“He is, actually,” she said softly. “I love you, Tom. I’ve always loved you and I always will, but Caleb loves me. He’s a good man, and he’ll take care of me.”

“I love you,” he whispered. “I’ll take care of you.” He stepped closer and cupped her face. “Livvie,” he said and kissed her.

“You didn’t deny it,” she whispered. He looked at her. “You and Trey.”

“He’s a boy with a crush, Livvie,” he sighed. “It will pass. I’m yours.” She shook her head.

“You’ve never been mine,” she said. “And I’m tired of pretending.” She turned around and left.

Later that night Tom sat quietly on the steps outside of The Barracks, the large building where most of The Royal Guard lived. He’d thought he’d be leaving it soon. Married officers took homes, his brother had offered him a place on his land.

“There you are,” Alexia Dumanis practically skipped over. Tom smiled. He’d become very fond of her. He didn’t have sisters but he imagined if he did he’d care about them how he did Lexi. “You had promised not to abandon us. Instead Trey and I have been stuck at dinner with all those stuffy nobles.”

“I’m sorry,” he said softly. “Where’s John, I believe that’s his job really?” She sat beside him.

“John is with Prince Anton,” she said, “planning Lady Marie’s security.” He nodded. “How was your evening?”

“Lady Olivia is getting married.” He said softly. Alexia nodded. “I shouldn’t be surprised, I left for six months.”

“I’m sorry,” Alexia said, “I imagine you love her very much.” He looked at her and nodded. “She’s very beautiful. I can’t say I’m too upset though. I would be very happy to call you brother.” He laughed.

“Am I that blind?” He asked. She smiled slyly.

“Trey is cautious, and Papa thinks you’re a menace, but if you don’t see it then, yes, Tom Martin, you are blind.” She kissed him on the cheek. Tom nodded. He stood up and walked out of the palace and down the market to the large and ornate townhouse that The Dumanis family had recently purchased. He stepped in the front door and turned seeing Trey sitting in the parlor.

“What are you doing here?” Trey asked quietly. “Aren’t you supposed to be with Lady Olivia tonight?” Tom nodded. “So, why aren’t you?”

“I want to try something,” Tom walked over and kissed him gently. Trey lit up and they pulled close. “Alright, good, then, that’s good.”

“Do you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting for that?” The younger boy smiled. Tom grinned back at him.