The Girl Queen

I entered the tent and Aaron and Olivia were already seated by his bedside. I sat beside them and Caleb looked over and smiled at me.

“We’ll leave you,” Olivia said softly, and they stood up. I swallowed and placed my hand on his.

“You look sad, Little One,” he said. “But you’ve had a great victory.” I smiled.

“You can’t die,” I said simply, “I refuse to allow it. I order you to live.” He smiled.

“I will try then,” he said, “Your Majesty,” he kissed my hand. “Oh my darling girl, how I’ve loved having you as mine.”

“Caleb, how can I do it without you?” I said.

“Trust the others,” he said, “they will guide you.” Not as he would have though. He hugged me. “Aaron said you spared Brayton.”

“Yes,” I whispered, “as you said to.” He smiled. “He showed me things. Visions.” He swallowed.

“In the smoke?” He said. I nodded. “An old trick, my love, you’re stronger than that.”

“I broke the spell,” I whispered. He nodded. “Caleb, my father,” I inhaled, “Olivia and my father.”

“No, love,” he shook his head, “no, it wasn’t what he thinks, it wasn’t what anyone thought. Ask her, she’ll tell you.” I nodded. “I am so proud of you, Lisette.”

“May I still be Lisette sometimes?” I asked him softly. A child’s question, what I’d asked him when he first told me who I was when I was seven.

“And Aaron must do whatever you say,” he smiled. I began crying and Olivia came back in. “Hello Livvie.”

“Caleb,” she whispered. “You’re a liar, you know, you promised to stay with me always.” He grinned.

“Forgive me then,” he whispered. “I love you.” She pressed her forehead to his and I felt his life leave him. We both stood quietly for a few moments.

“I can leave, if you’d like,” I finally said. She looked at me.

“No,” she said and stretched her hand out to me, “no stay with me.” I nodded and knelt with her beside him. “My Caleb,” she said softly. I looked at her, thinking of the scream I’d heard in my vision, her screaming my father’s name as he ran to his death.

“Where’s Aaron?” I asked.

“He went to see Athena,” she said softly. “That’s for the best, I think.” I nodded.

“I need to do something.” I said. She looked at me.

“Lisette,” she said, her voice changed, “you need to be very careful.” I nodded and went back to my tent. Tristan was waiting for me. I smiled and ran into his arms.

“It’s over?” He whispered. I nodded and pressed my face against his chest. “I’m sorry, Lisette, I will miss him.” He kissed me. “Do you want to be alone?”

“No,” I said softly, “I want you with me.” I was lying but I wasn’t unhappy that Tristan was here. His arms and his kisses were comforting, but not as comforting as sitting with Aaron and Olivia and lighting candles and whispering the names of the counts and countesses of Pantona asking them to accept Caleb into the ether. I went to the cot and lay down and he lay down with me. I curled into the space in between us. “Did Marina fix you?”

“She did,” he whispered, “she’s afraid you’ll blame her, for the Count.” I looked up at him. “Understand Lisette, this is new to her, she doesn’t know you,” he sighed, “she doesn’t know what this means for her.”

“I don’t want to talk about Marina,” I whispered and kissed him. He nodded and pulled me close. We lay there in silence, kissing, touching, until we inevitably made love.

We both knew what it was, the end of something. After, I pressed my forehead to his.

“I have to tell you something,” I whispered. He nodded. “I had a vision today.”

“A dream?” He asked. I shook my head.

“No, it was different,” I sighed, “but I Saw, well,” I sighed, “I love you, but you know,” he drew back, “you see I’ve had visions and Dreams about the prince of Phania for a long time, and I saw him so clearly today.”

“I see,” he said softly, “so before, that was what? You trying to forget it?”

“No,” I shook my head, “only, well, I don’t know what it means, and I,” I sighed, “I have to find out is all, he’s coming here, I don’t know when, but he is, and for us,” he kissed me again. “And while I figure that out I think I need, well, time, and space.” He pushed my hair off my face.

“You’re sending me away then?” He whispered. I closed my eyes.

“When I’m with you, there’s only you,” I explained, “I breath you in, I feel you, and I can’t have that and figure out what all this is.”

“What changed, in the past hour?” He asked softly.

“Caleb,” I admitted. He nodded. “He was supposed to help me with all of this, I wasn’t supposed to do it alone, I was counting on,” I choked on the tears.

“I understand,” he said, wiping my eyes, “Lisette, really,” I nodded, “but you aren’t alone, my love, you’ll never be alone, I’ll always be here.” I smiled. “Do you want me to go?”

“For now,” I whispered. He nodded stood up and left, I fell back against the pillows, and tried to sleep, but I could hear cheers and songs throughout the camp.

All Hail The Girl Queen! A few voices echoed. That had been what Caleb and Anselm had jokingly called me. I cried until I fell asleep.

 

Vision In Smoke

The palace was eerie, quiet, looming above me, just as it always had in my nightmares. Tristan and Athena flanked me, I didn’t know where Caleb and Aaron and Martin were, fighting somewhere else on the grounds probably.

I wiped my face and swallowed.

“Lisette,” Tristan said softly, “we’re with you.” I looked at him and smiled softly and nodded. Athena reassured me with a nod, and the drew her sword.

“Thank you both,” I said softly, “but no, this I have to do alone.” Athena came and hugged me tightly. “Find Aaron, he’ll need you.” I don’t know how I knew, but I did, then, suddenly. But I couldn’t let my heart break yet. She ran off and Tristan smiled at me and I kissed him. I knew what was waiting for me on the other side.

“I love you,” he said.

“I know,” I whispered. We kissed again and I entered the doors, as I’d done countless times in my dreams, I suddenly felt very alone and wished more than every that Marina was with. I was trying not to resent her fear of coming here, to think of her as a coward. But how could she not face it?

I glanced around, it was dark, I could barely see, so I conjured a small ball of light. That was when I heart the laugh.

“Welcome home cousin,” Brayton’s voice, echoed through the hall. “I had expected a Queen in all her glory, what a pity you’re alone.”

“Where are you?” I called out, and he laughed again. The room filled with smoke and I wanted to scream, maybe I did, I don’t know. I thought of Marina’s vision of the city in flames.

“Tell me Lisette,” his voice was in my mind, I was terrified. And how did he know that name? “Do you know what thread we’ve landed on?” A vision began to form around me out of the smoke.

I saw a man, handsome, tall, with red hair and light skin, and grey eyes like mine, my father, charging at a dark haired man holding a woman, dark skinned, small and beautiful, as she crumpled to the ground. It was Brayton, and my mother. I turned quickly and saw Olivia, screaming, “Anton no!” as Brayton’s sword slashed through my father.

“I should have thought you’d be in Pantona,” his voice filled my mind again. “Olivia was always so besotted with your dear father, but Caleb resented it so I thought he’d never shelter you.” I swallowed. He was wrong about so much.

Another vision formed of a ten year old girl, serious and quiet in a garden. I recognized her immediately. Marina. She was planting flowers, praying over them and they blossomed immediately.

“You see?” His voice said in awe. “She has such great power. Greater than yours.” I swallowed and found my voice.

“Enough!” I shouted and scattered the smoke, I realized then that it was out of his control and something else took hold of it. It formed another image, more immediate, in front of me.

It was a boy, near my age perhaps, dark skinned and haired, with a silver crown on his head. I exhaled.

“Eric,” I whispered, as if I knew him, and yet I knew we’d never met.

“Annalise,” he said softly and extended his hand, I extended mine and our fingers touched. It was the most natural feeling in the world. “I’m on my way,” he smirked, as if it were a joke between us, one we would both learn soon, “wait for me?”

“Of course,” I smiled back, “forever.” He nodded and the smoke dissolved to mist and then cleared. The hall was just a hall now, the spell, whatever it had been, was broken.

Eric. I would have to wait to be amazed at so clear a vision of the future. Or the present? I don’t know what that was. I made my way to the throne room.

“Well, you made it through the smoke,” he was sitting in the throne.  My throne.  My father’s throne. “I’m impressed. I would have thought the memory of Marina would break you.”

“Marina doesn’t want the throne,” I said softly, “and you’ll never touch her.” He smiled.

“So you say,” he smiled and stood up, I drew my sword. “You don’t need that cousin, though it’s nice to see it again. Who had it? Martin or Caleb? Martin probably, Anton never trusted Caleb. I did, which was foolish I suppose.” I lowered the sword. “Better.”

“I don’t understand,” I shook my head. He smiled. His smile scared me.

“No,” he said, “I could help you to though.” I grinned now. Perhaps he could. I raised the sword again and hit him over the head, knocking him out. I grabbed the rope from around my waist and tied his hands and legs. The doors swung open and Athena, Tristan and Aaron ran in.

“Dead?” Athena asked. I shook my head.

“No,” I whispered, “You’re all alright?” They nodded, but I saw that Tristan was bleeding.

“We are,” Aaron said softly, “but Lisette, Father,” he didn’t say more.

“We’ll go back,” I said. My heart caught in my throat. Goddess, not Caleb, I needed him. We walked back to camp and I saw Tristan limping as we got closer. “Go on ahead,” I said to the others. They nodded and went. “Tristan,” I said and took his hands.

“Why didn’t you kill him?” He asked. I shook my head. “Lisette what happened?”

“I can’t talk to you about it,” I said softly, “I’m sorry, I,” he nodded and kissed me. “I love you,” I whispered.

“I love you,” he said, “everything is about to change.”

“This won’t,” I said, I was lying, he knew it. “I promise, it won’t, it can’t.” He nodded and Marina walked up. I looked at her.

“Lisette, I’m sorry, Count Caleb,” she looked so pale. So drained.

“Alright,” I said quietly, “we won, I’ll be queen. That will cheer him.” Tristan squeezed my hands.

“Yes, love,” he said. Marina met his eyes. “I’m alright Marina.”

“He isn’t,” I insisisted. “You can help him?” She nodded and I left, hurrying to Caleb’s tent, praying to the god and goddesses and my father and his that he would be alive long enough that I could say goodbye.

The Farmgirl And The Merchant Boy

“I was thinking,” Tristan whispered, I lifted my chin from his chest, “about that afternoon, when we went into the village at Pantona, and met my cousins?” I laughed.

“I was furious,” I said softly, “Aaron was teasing me about being in love with you, and you were so rude to William,” he laughed.

“Athena was teasing me too,” he said, “and I wanted you so badly.” I looked at him. “I’m afraid, Lisette.” I sat up.

“Of the battle?” I whispered. He shook his head. “Of what, then?”

“Of you,” he said, I shrunk back. “You’re changed, and Marina and I,” I tucked my knees to my chest, hearing him say her name hurt. “Never mind.” I looked at him.

“I know,” I whispered, “but I can’t do this and be Lisette, I have to be the sword, after, maybe, I’ll be able to go back,” he kissed my forehead.

“Be the sword for them, for this,” he whispered, “but be Lisette with me.” I kissed him. “A farm girl and a merchant boy.”

“A farm girl took a merchant boy to a hillside,” I whispered. He laughed. “She pledged her love to him, and later it was revealed she was a queen and chosen by the gods for glory. The merchant boy took up a sword and followed her into the darkness.”

“What else could he do?” he whispered back, “when the queen pledged her love, she placed a spell on  him,” I laughed. “Will they come out of the darkness, do you think?”

“I hope so,” I whispered, “if it’s the kind of fairy tale that I loved best, they will.” He smiled and kissed me. “They’ll live happily ever after.”

“As you say,” he whispered. We fell asleep, whispering to one another.

I woke up in the morning and went to the armory, tent. Athena was already waiting, as was Aaron, I could see Dovetail below us in the valley and the army was gathered. Tristan was following behind me. Marina and I had already agreed that she would stay behind.

“Are you ready Princess,” Aaron grinned at me. I rolled my eyes at him. Caleb was standing with him too. I then ran and hugged them both.

“Where’s Olivia?” I asked Caleb. I wanted to see her.

“She begs your pardon,” he said softly, “but she can’t.” He looked in pain. I realized suddenly how very terrible today must be for her.

“Of course,” I said, I glanced at the army which would stand behind me. “And Marina, and Uncle Les?”

“Marina is with the other healers,” Aaron said, “preparing.” I nodded. A few guards brought the horses and we mounted, galloping quickly through the city. I was amazed by how quiet it was. Thomas’s evacuation had clearly worked. When we heard the first howl of shadows, we’d already reached the plaza in front of the palace.

“Duck,” Aaron yelled as one charged at me. I slashed it and jumped from horseback.

“Thomas,” I yelled, he grinned, spun his sword, “Caleb.” They both motioned to their squads and I approached the gates with Tristan and Athena and Aaron. We pushed the gates open and entered a courtyard, I saw the palace for the first time, in real life, and my heart caught in my chest.

“Lisette,” Aaron looked at me. I looked at him. “Your dreams?”

“Yes,” I said softly. We pressed carefully on when a host of shadows swirled around us. One lunged at me and Athena slashed it.

“Leave the dark one,” a hissing voice came from the center, “The Lord commands her surrvival.” I found what would likely be the eyes.

“Your lord does not command me,” I said, “and if he wants me, my companions pass as well.” The hissing started and I balled my fist, I prayed to the goddess and felt the power force a glow. The Shadows scattered and the doors of the palace creaked opened. I swallowed, knowing what would come next.

 

The March

I stood in the weapons tent, looking over what I was going to carry when we started moving. The tent parted and Caleb walked in. I locked eyes with him and he frowned.

“I don’t like this,” he said simply.

“I don’t care,” I shrugged. He sighed, and I looked at him. “Why?”

“You’re being rash,” he explained. “You can’t act without thinking things through anymore. This isn’t a game.”

“I’m aware,” I said simply. He nodded. “I knew about being the sword.”

“I assumed Anselm told you,” he shrugged, “it wasn’t for me to know or tell.” I pressed my hands against the table. “You aren’t angry with me then?”

“Not for that, no,” I whispered. He frowned. “How could you keep us apart?” He nodded. “Caleb, we could have helped each other. I could have learned,” I stopped.

“We didn’t want to,” he said softly, I scoffed. “Little One, look at me,” I stared at him in the eyes. “After your parents died, and then after Anne, Brayton wouldn’t alllow Les and Marina to leave the capital. Hell, he barely let them leave the palace, they couldn’t even live in the house the Brightcoast family usually did in the city.” I frowned. “Is there anything else?”

“No,” I muttered, “still, though.” He shook his head.

“You’re determined to march?” He asked. I nodded.

“I’m tired of waiting.” I said simply, “I know you’d prefer my birthday.” He shrugged.

“It isn’t up to me,” he said.  “You and Martin run the army, I go where you point.” I laughed.

“That won’t always be so,” I whispered. He frowned. “I’ll need you.”

“I’ll be there,” Caleb said softly, “but they’ll talk, you know. You don’t know court. They’ll say I run you. That can’t be.” I nodded. “Tell me Lisette, do you Dream, lately?”

“Yes,” I whispered. He nodded. “I see the Goddess, I see my parents, and,” I was quiet then. “It doesn’t matter, not right now.” He sighed. “Caleb, I swear, I’ll study every possible interpretation and legend around everything in every dream when we take the Capital, but I can’t focus on that now.”

“Alright,” he said. “Not Prince Eric then?” I frowned. “Will you send for him immediately, then?”

“I don’t think so,” I said, “I can’t, you’ve always said, I mean, the coronation, I suppose.” He shrugged. “Besides, not lately, anyway. Not for months.” He nodded.

“And the god?” He asked.

“No,” I whispered, “I’m chosen only of Rana, I think. Cornan needs another champion, but I don’t know who.” He nodded. “You don’t honor them.”

“No,” He admitted, “the gods are for others, my father taught me, those above us and below. We serve our family and our land, and that’s why we honor the ancestors and the soil.” I smiled. “You know this, you’re just being difficult little one.”

“Did you just come to provoke me and ask me about my dreams, then?” I asked. He shook his head.

“I’d like permission to send a healer to Davis,” he said. “He’s complaining of some ailment. I don’t see any sickness, but unless you want him to waste away.”

“Send Marina,” I said quietly. He nodded and bowed and left. He’s disappointed in me, and I know it. I’m being impatient and rash and he has to listen. I’m not Lisette, the orphan living under his roof anymore, and I think that will be as hard for him as it is for me.

“Your Highness,” Thomas said walking in after a few minutes. “You’re ready then?” I nodded. He rolled out a map and began to explain the last bits of the march to me. I smiled, knowingly. “There’s another thing.”

“Alright,” I said softly.

“When we enter the city,” he sighed, “there will be people, and there could be collateral damage.”

“I know,” I said, “but I don’t see how an evacuation could be managed.” He nodded. “You have a plan?”

“The Dumanis,” he explained. I wrinkled my brow.

“I won’t begin my rule in debt to Carland Dumanis,” I said. He smirked.

“Not Carland, but Trey might pass word along, if I asked him,” he said, “just whispers.”

“You would do that?” I asked. “It wouldn’t,” I sighed, “I know Thomas that,” he laughed.

“Years have cooled our parting, Highness,” he smiled. “Cool is the right term for it. And regardless of their father’s opinion, Tristan and Athena’s aunts and uncle have no love for Brayton. An oppressed populace is bad for bussiness.” I nodded.

“Alright then,” I said, that’s when Marina and Tristan burst in, Marina’s face a mask of fear, and Tristan flushed.

(Read what happened then here.)

The Shadows

We found the twins, and Tristan tossed Aaron a sword. He nodded and we began fighting the shadow army that had swirled.

I’d seen Dream reprsentations of the Black Guards, and Athena had told me about them but the fight felt endless, and relentless, time stopped and yet continued forever. And they just kept coming.

“Thena,” Tristan called out as she sliced two of them down with her spear, he nodded to the hill, where a knight was sitting. She stopped.

“He’s mine,” she said.

“Athena,” Thomas said riding up to her, “no.” She glared at him. “Not now.” She fumed and joined me. Then I looked over another hill and saw Marina on her way. What was she doing there? She shouldn’t be in a battle.

And then there was the light, blinding, and white and when it cleared, we were alone, the shadows were gone. I saw the light retreating towards Marina, and then she fell. I ran towards her.

“Tristan,” I heard Thomas shout, “get Davis.” I didn’t know what that meant. I assumed it was the commander. I didn’t have time for that. Tristan was frozen looking at Marina, limp and fallen.

I lifted her head as I got to her, she blinked at me.

“Annalise,” she whispered, I kissed her forehead and she lost consciousness again. Elodie was by my side then and Tristan, who quickly swooped her up, we ran, wordlessly to the medical tent.

“What was that?” Tristan asked. I looked at him. “It was magic, wasn’t it?”

“Yes,” I said softly, “and powerful.” He nodded. “She’s powerful, Tristan, scary powerful, I knew it the moment I saw her.” I looked down as she slept peacefully. “What we just saw was only a small taste of what she can do.” He leaned down and smoothed her hair.

“Rina,” he whispered, “why didn’t you ever tell me?” He looked completely betrayed. It wasn’t yours to know, something in me roared. “At the palace, she used to lead prayers, after dinner, quietly murmuring words to the goddess, candles would flicker sometimes, water swirl in glasses.” I looked at him, but he was looking at Elodie, “will she be alright?”

“Yes,” Elodie said, “she fainted is all, when she comes too, she’ll be weak, probably, and confused,” she sighed and looked at both of us. “She shouldn’t be alone.”

“I’ll stay with her,” I said quietly. Tristan looked at me. I didn’t want him to be the one she saw when she woke up.

“Alright,” he said, “I’ll check on our new prisoner. You want to question him?” I frowned t him. “His name is Warren Davis, he was a spy for Brayton and now he commands shadows, I imagine,”

“I will,” I said, “when I know Marina is out of danger.” Elodie sighed loudly.

“Your highness, she isn’t in danger, and you’ll,” she started, but I glared at her. “I’ll bring a basin and cool water, that will help.”

“Fine then,” Tristan said, “Your highness?” I looked at him.

“You’re dismissed,” I whispered and he nodded and left. Elodie followed and I began wetting her forehead. “Marina,” I whispered, “what was it?” But I knew, I’d read and heard about Queen Anessa, my name sake’s use of battle magic to recognize it. But Marina isn’t a warrior.

“She needn’t be,” I gasped looking up. Standing across from me was a woman. She was dark skinned, and dressed all in blue. She was shining too.

“My lady,” I said softly and genuflected.

“My, you were raised by a courtier, weren’t you?” The Goddess laughed. “You may stand.” I did. “So, Annalise, you have seen what I can do for you. I could do more, you know, if you’ll free me.”

“I will,” I said softly. She nodded and walked to Marina’s bedside.

“I had hoped for a more formal introduction to you both,” she sighed, brushing her hand over Marina’s curls. “My chosen champions. My brother drags his feet choosing a new one, Thomas let him down so. And Amina,” she clicked her tongue. “Well, she could have done worse, but she always had a flare for the dramatic, and deeply resented the alliance between Cornan and I that made you.” I swallowed. “So there’s Brayton. I ought to have claimed him myself, frankly, but I never had much use for the sons of this land.”

“My Lady Rana,” I said softly, she looked at me. “Where are you?” She sighed.

“If I knew, I would give you the place,” she said, “but I know not.” I nodded. “Everything is out of balance, you surely sense it?”

“Yes,” I whispered, “that’s it then, that’s my mandate. Balance?” She nodded. “But how?”

“Oh now, where’s the fun in that?” She said with a laugh and then was gone. I lurched in the chair, it was as if nothing had changed, except Marina jolted awake. We talked then. Quietly, Uncle Les, Caleb and Olivia came in and told us we were chosen.

Marina was furious, I understood why, but I wasn’t, I’d spoken with the Goddess. I couldn’t be angry. I left the tent and went to question Warren Davis. He didn’t tell me anything I didn’t know. Brayton would come, he wouldn’t be moved. Blah, blah, blah.

That night, back in my tent, Tristan lay beside me. We didn’t make love. I couldn’t, I knew I had to tell him the truth soon. I had to find Rana, and he couldn’t be a part of it. But I couldn’t let him go either. Losing him would be losing Lisette, and I couldn’t lose her.

“Come back to me,” he whispered, realizing I was somewhere else. “Lisette,” he sighed, “where are you?”

“Dovetail,” I said softly, “we have to go, and soon.” He nodded. “I’ll tell Thomas in the morning, we’ll start marching.” He pressed his forehead against mine. “Did you see anything? In the light?”

“No,” he said, “but you obviously did.” I frowned. “You’re not talking like yourself, and you’re,” I kissed him. “I’m not a fool Lisete, I’ll go if you want me to.”

“I don’t,” I said, “you swore! You said you’d stay.” He nodded and he held me. I felt like a child, but I knew I needed him.

“Then I’ll stay,” he whispered, “as long as you wish, Princess. I swore it then, and I swear it again.”

The Challenge

I woke up early the next morning ready for my challenge. I had to fight Thomas. I passed by the medical tent and got a polite nod from Marina as I headed out to the field. The guards were standing around, whispering. I glanced at Tristan, who was leaning against a tree. He winked at me and I tried not to giggle.

Athena walked over and handed me my sword, and I noticed Thomas standing, dressed in light boiled leather holding his. Caleb was next to him and he smiled at me and walked over.

“Your boot, Lisette,” he said and knelt down. It wasn’t untied. He made eye contact, and I nodded, grinning. “You didn’t forget?”

“Never,” I said. “General,” I called out. “Shall we begin?”

“As you wish, Your Highness,” he stepped over to me. “Captain,” Athena nodded, stepping out of the way. He struck once and I dodged, rather than block. Speed was my ally. “You’re afraid?”

“No,” I said and struck myself he blocked. “Not afraid, cautious.” He laughed.

“You won’t beat Brayton with caution, Princess,” he said.I dodged him again, but a swing took my legs out. “Cornan rewards a bold fighter.” I tumbled, and slid through his legs and then pulled a small knife out of my boot, I sliced his pant leg, winning the duel.

“But I am the sword of Rana, General,” I grinned up at him and he laughed, “and The Goddess likes her own to be cunning.”

“So she does,” he said and lifted me up. “A nasty trick you taught her Count.” Caleb was laughing from the side and the rest of the guard had begun cheering.

“She doesn’t have size on her side in any fight,” Caleb shrugged, “but surprise is as good an ally as any.”

“True enough,” Thomas said, “still.” I grinned and went to Tristan who took my hands.

“You were good,” he said, “faster than most.” I shrugged and we walked along. “It won’t be long now, will it?”

“No,” I said softly, “not long at all. I feel it, everything around me, I know it has to be soon.” He pulled me close and kissed me. “I’m afraid,” I admitted.

“No one would know it,” he said, “I wouldn’t even, if you didn’t tell me.” I kissed him again. “And if you need to, you can hide, and Thena and I will take care of all of it.” I giggled.

“I don’t know that she would approve of that plan.” He shrugged and kissed my palm. “And I need to be at the front of it, Tristan, I know you want to protect me, but you can’t, not from this.” He frowned.

“I know,” he sighed, “but I still wish.” I nodded and held close to him. He sensed it too, I think, in his way, that we were nearing the end.

“My darling,” I said softly. I heard a throat clear. Elodie Wills, Athena’s friend was standing beside us. “Mistress Elodie, I’m sorry,”

“No, I’m sorry, your highness,” she said, “only well, the Viscount asked me to find you.”  I nodded, she grinned at Tristan who sighed and kissed my forehead.

“Don’t keep him waiting,” he sighed. “He’ll never let us hear the end of it.” I squeezed his hand and followed after Elodie.

“Lady Athena told me some of your story, Mistress,” I said. She nodded. “I mean to keep the guilds in hand.”

“I’d always hoped so, your highness,” she said softly. “Lady Athena doesn’t quite share my view.” I nodded.

“We’re all a bit blind when it comes to our families,” I smiled. I watched Aaron stand with Marina, teasing her, and grabbing at her apron. She giggled. “And now I must see to mine.” Elodie laughed as I skipped over to them. “You summoned me?”

“Requested an audience,” Marina said simply, I laughed, “you outrank us both.”

“Ah, but to ignore the desires of my two most powerful courtiers would be ill advised,” I said, “what is that you both need?”

“I wanted to congratulate you,” Aaron said, “Athena said you did well.”

“Well, if Athena says so,” I grinned. Marina giggled. “I did in fact, I used my knife.”

“Oh, gods,” he sighed dramatically, “that damn knife.” I slid my arm through Marina’s.

“I dreamt last night, you know,” I said simply, “did you?”

“No,” she said. “I haven’t in a while.” I nodded. “What did See?” I sighed. “Prince Eric again?”

“I think so,” I said. Aaron rolled his eyes. “The ship at least. He’s north, I can tell that much, or he was, very recently.” She looked at me. “He knows it’s coming too, I think.”

“Lisette,” Aaron said softly, “does Tristan know?” I looked at him and shook my head. Marina looked away. “You should tell him, it isn’t fair.” I frowned.

“I know,” I sighed, “I know, but he’ll hate me.”

“I don’t think so,” Marina said, “I don’t think he could.” I looked at her. “I should get back to work.” She curtsied to me and Aaron took her hand and kissed it and she scrurried off.

“You shouldn’t flirt with her,” I said, “she’s young and,” he laughed.

“Marina is in no more danger of falling in love with me than you are,” he said, “we get on, that’s all.” I nodded. “She worries about you, you know.”

“Well, she never had visions of me murdering her so I think she’ll be alright.” He snorted. “I don’t think she will, now.”

“No,” he said, “I don’t think so either.” I nodded. “Lisette, I’m going to ask Athena to marry me.”

“Oh, that’s good, then,” I said. “What does Caleb say about it?” He frowned.

“We need your permission,” he explained. I laughed. “I’m serious, Lisette, it’s all part of it. She’s in the guard, she can’t without,” I shook my head,

“As if I wouldn’t give it,” I shook my head, “ask her. Marry her, be happy.” He laughed and picked me up and spun me. Then we heard the shouts, and the sky turned black.

“Shadows!” I heard Thomas calling out. “To arms!” I swallowed and looked at Aaron, he nodded and we ran quickly to the main field.

Meditation

I sat beside the lake, I liked it here, it was peaceful, calm, away from the bustle of camp. I inhaled and tried to meditate but no peace came.

“Do you mind?” I turned and saw General Martin. I shook my head. He sat with me. I was surprised.

“You meditate?” I asked. He shrugged.

“Not much since I lost the blessing, it isn’t as necessary. But I still enjoy it,” I smiled at him. “I don’t see my presence being soothing to you though?”

“Not if we can’t talk a bit,” I admitted. He nodded. “When you lost the blessing, why?”

“Well,” he sighed, “I failed in my mandate, to protect the balance.” He closed his eyes. “When your parents were killed, and your ascension put in question, that was the end.” He looked at me again. “As if Anton’s death wasn’t enough punishment, Cornan decided I was also to lose my mandate altogether.” The sadness in his voice wasn’t about the blessing.

“Were you in love with him?” I asked softly. He stopped and looked at me.

“With the god?” He tried. “No, serving a god is too complicated for that.” I laughed and he grinned. “With your father?” I nodded. “I don’t know, I thought so, sometimes. I certainly loved him, he was my closest friend,” he frowned, “and we loved the same woman, it was all very complicated.”

“My mother?” I said. He cocked his head.

“Marie?” He laughed. “No, no, John perhaps, but not me. She was far too quiet for me.” I looked at him.

“Olivia then,” I said, he smiled sadly. “I knew, I mean, I didn’t know, but I knew.” He smiled.

“That’s Marie,” he said softly, “god, she used to say that sort of thing every day. Everyone else thought she was insane because they didn’t know what it was like, that wave of understanding when you see something.” I took his hand.

“Did you Dream?” I whispered. He shook his head. “Tell me more about my father.” We glanced across the lake and I saw Marina sitting.

“No,” he said softly, “not tonight, that is. There is somewhere else you have to be.” I nodded and walked over to her. When our eyes met, I suddenly understood why she’d been so shy around me.

I Saw all of it. I Saw Tristan holding her and whispering that he wanted her. And she looked so afraid.

She’s afraid of everything, Athena had said. It’s irritating. 

But we finally talked. (Again, note from Reenie: This conversation already exists. It’s awesome, read it there!) It took a lot, but I’m happy to be friends with her, though there was a point that needed ironing out.

“Does your father want to go home?” I asked. Marina looked at me.

“He’ll be coming home, when we go back to Dovetail,” she said oddly. “Oh! You mean Brightcoast? I suppose he might, I believe they used to go in the summer, the whole court, we could go, Goddess, that will be work, I don’t believe anyone’s been in the manor or the summer palace in ten years.” I laughed. When she babbled she got a funny vacant look on her face.

“I meant Tumona actually,” I said softly. She turned away and swallowed.

“Phania isn’t home,” she whispered. “That’s what he’ll say, if you ask. But I think, somewhere, deep down, yes, he does. It’s not possible though, King Daniel barred him years ago.”

“It might be,” I said softly. She swallowed and we didn’t say anything else for a while.

“You said before that,” she sighed, “that you need me.” I looked at her. “You don’t.”

“I do,” I said, “I don’t know why you would ever think that I didn’t, or that anyone wouldn’t.” She looked away again.

“You don’t understand,” she said softly. “How could you? You had the world, and I had a dusty library and my father and no idea what the future was, or what it could be.” This I recognized. Fear felt foreign, but this was anger. Anger I know, anger, I have.

“No,” I said softly, “no I can’t understand that. I can only understand biting my tongue when I made a friend, never knowing when the axe would fall, and Aaron.” She nodded.

“I keep thinking about Athena,” she whispered. I laughed. “I didn’t know him, I didn’t think I wanted,” she rubbed her face. “I wanted to be rescued, and I didn’t know him, and Pantona and Brightcoast united.” I laughed harder then. “It isn’t funny.”

“It’s a little funny,” I grinned, “he kissed me once, when I was twelve, and when I asked him why, his answer was, ‘I think I’d be a pretty good king, don’t you.'” She giggled. “But you think like that too.”

“Like what?” She looked baffled.

“Politically,” I explained. “I don’t, I’m bad at it. Caleb tried to teach me, but it gives me a stomachache.” I thought of Prince Eric, and Phania and the goddess. But I wasn’t ready to tell her all of that yet. The sun started to go up.

“Lisette,” she said softly, “he loves you.” I swallowed.

“Can we not,” I sighed, “we can we not talk about him?” She looked at me. “I can’t, with you.”

“Alright,” she whispered and stood up and floated away. I went back to my tent as the sun started to rise and saw Tristan asleep in a chair. He woke up as I walked in.

“I was worried,” he said. I smiled and took his hand and lead him to bed. We kissed and undressed. “Lisette,” he mumbled.

“I love you,” I said. “Why were you worried?”

“When you’re out of my sight, I worry,” he whispered, “when you stay out all night, I think you may have died.” I smiled.

“I was with Marina,” I explained. He nodded.

“I should,” he started and I kissed him. “Lisette,” he pushed me away. I looked at him. “What did she tell you?”

“She didn’t,” I said, “she didn’t need to.” He looked afraid. They don’t understand. I realized. “We talked about a lot of things. But somethings we don’t need to.”

“Because of the damn blessing,” he said standing up. I swallowed. “Do you think that’s what it is?”

“What what is?” I asked. He looked at me.

“Rana is playing games with me,” he said softly. I sighed.

“Is that what you think?” I said. “That you love me because of the goddess? That you want her because of her?” He sighed and came back to me.

“No,” he said, “not really.” We kissed deeply. “I only know that when I’m with you, or not with you, there’s only you.” I smiled. He was lying, whether he knew it or not. “Lisette,” he mumbled.

“Tristan,” I whispered back to him. “Martin said your father was in love with my mother.” He laughed.

“I knew that,” he said, “my mother used to tease him about it.” I giggled. “Lisette, be honest, what are you afraid of here?”

“I’m not afraid,” I explained, “I keep thinking about my father.” He nodded. “He wasn’t afraid, and it killed him.” He kissed the top of my head.

Arrival

I swallowed seeing what looked like a city of tents swimming below us in the valley. I sighed, it all looked beautiful but so many people! I don’t think I’d ever seen so many people in one place.

“Goddess,” I whispered. Tristan looked at me.

“Courage Lisette,” Athena said, nudging me. “It won’t be. so bad.” I nodded and we rode a bit further along, before she inhaled sharply at the figure on horseback. “Martin!” She exclaimed and galloped.

“Well, that was inevitable,” Caleb sighed and we trotted up after her. “General.”

“Count,” The general said. I looked at him, and tried to make up my mind about him. He was a large man, handsome, in a way, and Athena looked, well, glowing. “Countess,” he said, nodding at Olivia. “Cornan’s sword,” he whispered as we locked eyes. “Your Highness, I’m at your disposal.”

“Thank you,” I said. I had a hundred questions for him. About my father, something in me knew he was the right person to tell me everything about my father. “I suppose we should.” He nodded and we rode on. I felt Aralla, my horse steady under me as we walked through the camp. We arrived on a center of the tents and I swallowed.

There she was beautiful, and dressed in a blue healer’s dress. Her eyes were wide and brown, and she was staring at me.

She’s darker than I am, but otherwise, we look very alike, and she’s small, so small. I feel in a daze, vaguely hearing everyone greet her as we dismount. She’s trying not to look at me, I can tell. Then I notice Aaron take her hand and kiss it. I see Tristan’s jaw tighten, and Athena rolls her eyes.

“Aaron,” I manage to say, “Don’t flirt with her!” He winks at me and I sigh loudly. Aaron being obnoxious has broken then spell.

“This is Princess Annalise, Lady Marina,” Athena said, “Lisette, may I present your cousin, Lady Marina Sanpierre of Brightcoast.” Then she curtsied, and we talked.

I was glad to talk to her, spilling out a thousand nervous questions.  (A Note From Reenie: Read Marina’s POV on this to get this conversation, writing it again would be pretty boring!) We’re going to have dinner with her tonight, her and my uncle, I’m curious to meet him. And to hear about my mother.

I walked to a tent that Olivia was standing in front of. It looks quite large.

“Is this yours, Olivia?” I said. She laughed.

“No, love, it’s yours,” she said, parting the middle. I swallowed as I looked around. There was a large bed, several books and maps on a desk, and it’s all very grand looking. “You’ll have to get used to these sorts of things, I suppose. The trappings, your father used to call them.” I nodded, and sat on the bed. “Well, you’ve met her now.”

“Yes,” I said softly. “So I have.” I thought for a moment. “I think she’s as afraid of me as I am of her.” She laughed.

“Perhaps,” Olivia whispered. “Caleb will be with Les now,” Tristan walked into the tent now, “I should make sure Aaron isn’t making trouble.” I nodded and she left. Tristan came close and kissed me. I whimpered softly into him.

“I suppose I can’t just do that whenever I want now,” he said. I laughed. “Are you alright?”

“Yes,” I said, “I’m having dinner with my family.” He nodded.

“I know,” he said, “Marina invited me.” I smiled, that made the whole thing seem less fearsome. “Lisette, I, feel,” he looked down, “I know I told you,” I looked at him.

“What?” I asked softly. He ran his hands through my hair. I kissed him again. We fell back against the bed.

“I love you,” he muttered, “I suppose we have to be more careful now.” I giggled.

“You do at that,” we turned over to the  door and so General Martin standing, smirking at us. “Captain.” Tristan leapt up and saluted.

“General,” he said, “Athena,”

“Has said her piece,” the general smiled, “you weren’t losing sleep over my condition, then?”

“No sir,” Tristan grinned back at him, “I imagine it would take a thousand shadows to defeat you. And my trust in Lady Marina is greater than my sister’s.”

“Good then,” Martin said, “Princess, if it’s convenient, I’d like a word.”

“Of course,” I mumbled, was I blushing? I felt all hot. “Sir Tristan you’re dismissed.” Tristan rushed out, “we were only,”

“No need,” Martin said and sat in the desk chair, “Tristan’s past due for some foolishness, and I imagine Anselm and Caleb have already lectured you.” I frowned, he wasn’t what I expected. “I wanted to give you a few things.” I nodded. He reached into the large leather bag he had with him and laid them out on the desk. I exhaled and walked over.

There were three things there, a sword, the hilt with a sparkling green jewel standing out, a necklace of pearls, surrounding a single blue stone, and a silver circlet, clearly meant to be worn on the crown.

“Goddess,” I whispered, running my fingers over the treasures. “These are mine?”

“Aye,” he grinned, “the sword was your father’s I made it for him myself, the circlet is older than dirt, I think, the heir is supposed to wear it in public, I stole it away from Dovetail when I fled last year. And the necklace was Marie’s, one of her things from Phania, from Tumona.” I nodded.

“Caleb says I shouldn’t flaunt the Phania connection,” I said. Martin snorted.

“You’re chosen, aren’t you?” Martin said. I nodded, “I doubt that Rana would appreciate you ignoring her blessing.” I giggled at that and lifted my hair off my neck as he fastened it. “You have your father’s eyes you know.” I turned and looked at him. “Exactly, I’d forgotten, the color.” Something came over me then, a feeling I’d never felt before, like someone, or something else was inside of me.

“Thomas,” I said quietly, “it’s alright, I’m home now.” He smiled softly at me.

“So you are, Princess,” he said, “I can rest now.” I nodded and he knelt, I leaned down and kissed his forehead gently. “Thank you.” I smiled at him. I knew him, in that moment, this man, who’d been beloved of my father.

“Rise then, and show me my army,” I said. He stood up. I fastened the sword around my waist and place the circlet on my brow.

I was a lost princess, no more.

Promise

Riding with the twins is a lot of fun, something I didn’t quite expect when we left Pantona. They’re constantly grinning at one another and challenging each other to races, and dragging Aaron and I into it and then trading jokes. I wonder sometimes what it will be like when it’s no longer than just the four of us.

We made camp for the night and I was mostly surprised by how easily Olivia adapted to it. I’m so used to her in the manor, so refined and dignified, her on a bedroll in a tent seems wrong.

“Oh, I never could do it for long,” She said, “but the full camp gives me a real bed.” I smiled. “How are you doing?” She asked. I shrugged.

“It doesn’t feel real yet,” I admitted. She nodded and yawned. “I’ll let you sleep.”

“My dear,” she said softly, and took my hand. “Are you sure you’re alright?” I nodded and hugged her tightly.

“No,” I admitted, “I, last night, I Dreamed, I saw my mother.” I hadn’t seen her before, but the dreams, well, I wasn’t sure what any of them were anymore. Visions, and faces, and my mother screaming in pain and fear, and Prince Eric sailing through a storm and Tristan beside me when I woke, holding me closely.

“You saw Marie,” she said softly. I nodded. “Darling, it’s alright, maybe it wasn’t a vision, just a long buried memory.” I swallowed. It wasn’t, we both knew it wasn’t. “When did you last sleep without a dream?”

“In the spring,” I sighed, “before the twins came, I suppose, but even then, they were becoming more regular.” She nodded. “It’s all coming soon, I think, and the gods don’t want me to forget it.”

“As if you could,” She smiled. I nodded. “You’ll be alright. Hopefully in Dovetail the sisters or the University will know how to handle it.” I nodded. But I knew she was by no means sure. “Try to sleep anyway, I promise, this can’t last.” I smiled and walked back to my tent. Tristan and I had been sharing, another thing I knew couldn’t last.

I wondered if he knew. He must. But we didn’t talk about it. Ever.

He smiled at me and I slid under the blankets. I wanted him, but I knew, not tonight.

“Are you alright?” He asked softly. I nodded. “Lisette,” he said softly, running his finger against my face. I loved him for calling me Lisette, would that stay, would the look on his face right now?

“I don’t want this summer to end,” I said softly. “It was like gold.” He nodded.

“A golden summer,” he said. I nodded.

“Tell me more about what to expect when we get to the camp tomorrow,” I said snuggling into him. He smiled.

“Well,” he said and kissed my hair,  “you’ll have to fight General Martin, but you know that.”

“I have to what?” I said. He laughed.

“Just sparring,” he said, “all the officers have to, it’s a test. Unless you don’t want to be an officer.” I rolled my eyes. “You’ll meet Lady Marina, and your uncle, they’ll be so happy to meet you.” I nodded. “And no matter what, you need to sleep.” I smiled and kissed him again. I slept, and I dreamed, and Dreamed, nothing good or solid in either directions, just images.

And then that final one, the one that comes over and over, walking through the palace, into the throne room, but this time it was different, she was there, Marina, not with Brayton this time and not on the throne either.

“What did you think would happen?” She said sharply, her dark eyes clear and angry. She stepped away and I saw on the dais, clear as anything Tristan’s body slumped and lifeless, covered in blood. “You killed him.” I looked down and saw my sword covered in blood, I knew it was his. I woke up and realized I was screaming. Tristan looked at me and held me close.

“Lisette,” he said, “it’s alright, love, it’s alright,” I was sobbing. I looked at him. “Was it bad?”

“You were,” I said softly and kissed him, “no, you’re safe, you’re here,” I pressed my forehead to his chest.

“Where else would I be?” He said rubbing my back. “I’m with you.”

“You won’t leave?” I said, softly, “ever.”

“Not ever,” he whispered and kissed me again. I pulled myself close to him, then kissed him moving my hands below him waist. “Lisette,” he stopped me, “what was it?” I looked at him.

“I killed you,” I said, “or she did, but you died.” He swallowed and drew away. “The dreams aren’t,” I sighed, “I explained about the threads of time?” He nodded. “The dreams are just one thread, and that’s why they change, why they’re so,” I sighed. “You won’t die, I won’t let,” he kissed me again.

“Do you remember, the day we met,” he said, I nodded, “I said I would die for you and I meant it then, just out of duty, but know now, that I mean it with all of my heart. I will die for you if it comes to that.”

“You won’t,” I said, “I won’t let it happen.” We made love then, and I slept for the rest of the night soundly and woke up in the morning before the sun. I sat out and took a deep breath as I watched it go up.

I’d made a promise that I had no idea how to keep. Or if I could. And even worse, I knew now that there was a part of me that could kill him.

A Gift And A Goodbye

I rose early the next morning to go training, but couldn’t find Athena. I wondered if she was out already, but made my way out to the stables, Tristan had mentioned wanting to go riding and I decided to join him, when I saw Caleb standing waiting.

“Good Morning,” he said. I smiled softly at him. “Are you alright?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” I said, “is that alright?”

“Perfectly,” he shrugged, “I have something for you,” I smiled, “come.” I walked in with him and saw standing in the middle a horse I’d never seen before. “It’s a bit early, but I thought a birthday present would be alright.” I giggled softly and walked over. “You’ve never had your own, but it wouldn’t do for The Lost Princess to return on a borrowed stable horse from someone else’s stable.”

“Caleb,” I whispered, petting her neck. “What’s her name?” I knew she was a mare immediately. And perfect. Clean white, shining, almost like a star.

“Doesn’t have one yet,” he grinned. “The Dumanis don’t name their animals. Charlotte showed her to me when I met them along the way back.” I smiled. “She’s shrewd that one, just a smile, and ‘I thought you might want to look at a horse, your grace, something suitable for a young woman.'” I remember the half smile on Charlotte’s face when she’d mentioned I was Phanian. I’d wondered what she’d guessed then, know I knew for sure.

“I’ll have to think it over,” I cooed, “thank you Caleb.” He smiled. “Have you seen Athena?”

“She went into town to find someone who could send her letter,” he said. I nodded. “William ran so quickly last night, before I could mention that I think,” I laughed.

“You think I should tell him the truth,” I said. He nodded. “Olivia told me, that he asked for me.” Caleb laughed. “I can only imagine you two scrambling for something to say.”

“It was something we’d anticipated,” he shrugged, “not with William specifically, but well, you’re a reasonably appealing young woman, and certainly not without local position, even if you were simply our ward. We’d assumed a village boy, or a younger merchant son might ask for you at some point.”

A younger merchant son. That gave me a pang. In another world, the world where I was really Lisette, and Tristan was really just a guest of my foster parents, he’d have asked for me. I’d be Lady Dugarry, not Queen Annalise.

“I’ll talk to him today,” I said softly. I pressed me forehead against the horse’s nose, not knowing what to say exactly.

I walked out towards the village and found Athena on her way back, she looked agitated.

“Are you alright?” I said. She frowned.

“I was,” she said, “I’d even calmed down about the General, but then I ran into that awful farmgirl, Katie?”

“Kathy,” I said. She nodded. “Yes, I don’t think she’d like you much.” Athena pressed her lips into her mouth.

“I certainly didn’t ask Aaron to abandon her minutes after she slept with him to chase after me,” she muttered, “it isn’t my fault.” I giggled, realizing this seemed like a familiar problem to her. “Where are you off to, and why isn’t my brother tailing behind you, in case a shadow or spy pops out of the orchard to carry you away to darkness?”

“He’s asleep,” I said, “and it seems unlikely at this juncture. If a spy were watching us, they’d probably wait until we’re all on the move to grab me.”

“Hmm,” she nodded, “I suppose so.” She was grinning now.

“I’m heading into town, but since you just came from that way, I’d assume you don’t want to join me,” she shook her head.

“No,” she said, “I have to talk to Aaron, and you’re likely going to have a rather serious conversation that should be had alone?” I nodded. “Good luck.” I smiled and waved.

Once I reached town, I noticed Kathy at her father’s stand looking very grumpy. I decided not to poke at that. That was a benefit to not being Lisette anymore, not having to deal with fallout of Aaron’s entanglements. I reached the inn and walked in. The maids all nodded at me and one pointed me towards William’s parlor. He smiled when he saw me.

“What a nice surprise,” he said, “Two days in a row at that.” I laughed.

“I wanted to talk to you,” I said, “but I didn’t get a chance last night.” He nodded. “William, I,” I swallowed. “We’re leaving soon.”

“I see,” he said quietly. “Going west?” I nodded. “This has something to do with Sir Tristan?”

“Yes,” I said, “and no.” I folded my hands. “I mean, he’s coming with us, of course, but,” I swallowed. “I’m not Lisette.” He scrunched his face in confusion. “I mean, I am, but she’s not, a real person.” I frowned. “I’m botching this. You see a lot of people come through, you’ve probably heard, rumors, stories,” I swallowed, “sightings.”

“Of?” He asked. “Last week I had a man who swore his horse was actually a unicorn, but I’m not following.”

“Of girls like me,” I said softly, “orphaned half Phanian girls,” I sighed, “who might not be what they seem.” His eyes widened.

“Gods, I’m a fool,” he muttered. I bit my bottom lip and glanced down. “Lisete, I mean, your highness, I guess.” I nodded. “So you’re going west, to go,” I nodded again. “Are you terrified?” I suddenly felt a surge of affection for William and flew across the room and hugged him.

“I’ll miss you,” I said softly, “really, before you came I didn’t have any friends except Aaron, and it’s been wonderful to have someone else.”

“Yes,” he smiled, “and just think what a good story it will be,” he whispered, “I courted the Queen of Cammadan herself, not that she had any idea of course.” I giggled. “I think we’d have made a good match though.”

“I can think of worse,” I said. “You don’t hate me?” He laughed.

“No, Lisette,” he said, “I don’t hate you.” He frowned. “Can I still call you Lisette?” I smiled.

“In private,” I shrugged, “I’ll be Your Highness in public though, until it’s Your Majesty.” He nodded. “Come with us.”

“No,” he said, “maybe, later when things are settled, but I’m not much use in a fight Lisette.” I smiled.

“Fine then,” I said softly.