Note: We need to talk about Brea. I love writing “mean girls,” I love digging into their hearts and hurts and insecurities. And Brea, well, like with everyone, it’s complicated. Also, this is a long one.

She sat at their table, which was a place of honor, she reminded herself, and tried not to pout. This feast was supposed to be celebrating that Chieftan Marcus’s oldest son, Harran was home from a long trip to Cammadan.

“You’d been looking forward to this” Brea’s sister Nika said, pinching her gently. “Why are you in such a bad mood?” Brea frowned.

“He won’t even look at me,” she said. Nika plucked one of the flowers out of a vase on the table and stuck it behind her sister’s ear. She picked up a cup and sipped on the beer that had been poured. The feasts at the border keep were always loud and a bit wild. She and Nika were allowed to come only under their mother’s watchful eyes. She sighed. “Did I do something wrong?”

“Of course not,” Nika said and rubbed her arm, but Brea shook her head. She was prettier than ever, she’d thought, after the summer, and she’d turned sixteen and started wearing her long black hair down her back rather than covering it in a veil like her mother and sister. But Harran had granted her a kiss on the hand and a pleasant but indifferent greeting. Not the reaction she was hoping for.

“I need some air,” she stood up and walked out to the courtyard and tried not to cry.

“Lady Brea?” Prince Rian walked out. She swallowed and looked at him and squared her shoulders and smiled sweetly. “Are you feeling well?” Rian resembled his older brother, but he was slighter, and a bit darker, he simply took up less room.

“It was hot,” she lied, “I needed to get air.” He smiled.

“My brother takes up a great deal of it,” he said. She looked at him. “Air, I mean.” She nodded. She didn’t want to lead Rian on, he was nice enough, and she knew their parents supported the match between them, but she wanted Harran, she loved Harran.

“I suppose so,” she said. “You must be happy he’s home.” Rian shrugged.

“My father is,” he said, “and it means I get to go to Rastan for the winter.” She nodded. “Brea,” he said, “you should know,” before he could finish, thank the gods, Harran walked out.

“Rian, there you are,” he said. “Lady Brea,” he bowed lightly.

“Your Highness,” she said, and dipped a curtsey, her eyes not leaving his. Look at me, she begged inwardly, wondering if her power could maybe pull him to her. “We’re glad to have you home.” He smiled gently at her.

“Thank you,” he said, “your family honors me with you presence.” She smiled.

“Did you enjoy your time in Cammadan?” She asked. He smiled.

“I did,” he said. “I was sorry to leave,” she nodded. “The Count of Pantona and his family were very good to me.”

“His family?” She asked. “I thought he only had a son.”

“There’s a girl too,” Harran said cheerfully, “his natural daughter some people think, or just a war orphan, they didn’t say. Lisette.”

“Harran,” Rian said, trying to stop him, but it was too late, Brea had already seen the look on his face.

“Oh,” she whispered. That was what Rian was going to tell her. Harran was in love. With some Cammadie farm girl. “Leaving her must have been difficult.” He smiled. He didn’t see, he didn’t see at all, her heart had just cracked in two.

“It was, yes,” he said.

“Harran,” Rian said, breaking whatever revelry his brother had entered. Harran looked at him. “You were looking for me.”

“Right,” Harran said, “Father wanted to speak to you.” Rian nodded and they walked back inside. Brea sat down and looked up at the moon.

Nearly a year went by, their usual rhythm of coming and going from the keep, stayed. In the spring, Rian returned from Rastan and gave her a pearl bracelet which she accepted with a smile.

“It’s beautiful,” she said as he slid it on her wrist.

“Princess Rila suggested it, when I asked a what gift to bring you,” he said, shyly. She smiled. “Brea, I think we should talk.” She pressed her lips into her mouth.

“If you like,” she said. She looked inside the hall and saw Harran sitting with a few other people. “Rian, this was very thoughtful,” he smiled sadly.

“But no thank you?” He said. She nodded. “You can’t say I didn’t try.” She laughed. “My brother is a fool,” she sighed.

“I wish it was you,” she said, “it would make everything easier.” He smiled. But she’d made her decision. She’d made it months ago.

That night before dinner was over she slipped out and into Harran’s chamber. She undressed and lay in the bed, and waited. The door opened and then she sat up.

“Brea?” He asked, clearly confused. “What are you doing here?” She smiled and let the blankets drop off of her. “Brea,” his voice was soft, but a little frustrated. “You should go.”

“I don’t want to,” she said softly. He picked up her robe with a sigh and sat down to cover her. Instead she leaned close and kissed him.

“Don’t do that,” he said and guided her away. “Rian,” he started.

“I don’t want Rian,” she whispered, “I want you, I’ve only ever wanted you.” He looked at her. “You must at least think about me,” she slid his hands to her waist. “Enjoy seeing me?”

“You’re very beautiful,” he was still talking so carefully, so gently. “You know that. But this isn’t,” she kissed him again. This time he bent to her more. “Brea,” he whispered.

“I’m yours, Harran,” she said softly. “You can have me however you want.” Did your little farm girl ever offer you that? she thought. He kissed her back hungrily. She let her magic graze his skin to show him what she meant.

Lust makes beasts of us all, her mother had told her once, when after performing a wedding, they’d watched a shy young man, a shepherd known for his gentleness, drag his pretty little bride to his tent, and the girl’s cries had startled and even frightened her. At least now he’s bound to protect her.

“I won’t hurt you,” Harran murmured, as if he’d seen the same memory. It had worked. she looked at him. “Not on purpose at least, I know for girls, the first time,” she groaned as he slid his hands between her thighs and parted them. “I’ll be gentle.”

“How do you know it’s my first time,” she whispered as his fingers parted her lips and he began suckling at her breasts. Her body shuddered.

“Brea,” he laughed, “if any man or boy had had you they’d have bragged endlessly,” she whimpered as he found the secret place in her that she’d touched thinking of him so many nights. “Except perhaps my brother and you’ve just said that you two hadn’t.”

“Oh,” she whispered. Of course, Brea Averran, the desert rose, one chief has called her. Such a beauty, and the other such a talent, the gods blessed your parents. “Ohh,” her next exhale was one of shock as Harran’s hardness invaded her. He was so large, and it did hurt, a little, but he was stroking in and out of her so gently, his hands on her back, gently moving in circles, she mostly felt dizzy with pleasure.

“So beautiful,” he whispered. Yes, if it was her beauty that he wanted, rather than herself, she would live with it. “So soft, and tight, Brea.” He grunted her name and withdrew spending in the sheets. The sudden absence of him made her mewl with need.

Lusts makes beasts of all of us.

“I need more,” she said, clinging to him, he chuckled gently and began moving his kisses down her body, “Harran,” she moaned his mouth landed between her thighs, and he licked and kissed her.

Nika had whispered to her once that a girl had done this for her, but she’d never expected it from a man. She moaned and writhed as her pleasure gripped her and then collapsed.

He wrapped around her from behind, burying his face in her hair. Any man who had you would brag endlessly. Yes, most of the keep would know about this tomorrow, but she couldn’t bring herself to care.

The chieftain’s health and mind were failing. He had three sons, Harran the presumptive heir. Brea and Nika had been volunteered by their father to help care for him. So her days were taken up with the father and her nights with the son.

Every night she wondered if she and Harran had reached the limits of pleasure only to find there was more, always more. And it wasn’t only sex, when they lay in bed together, they talked.

“I don’t know if I’m ready,” he whispered. She looked at him. “What if the tribes want someone else?”

“Why would they?” She asked. He laughed lightly.

“Not everyone sees me how you do, Brea,” he mumbled, and kissed her forehead. She smiled.

“It isn’t as though I think you’re perfect,” she rolled her eyes. “You’re terrifically arrogant, and you have awful table manners, and you laugh too much even when whatever was said wasn’t that funny.”

“Well that is a through accounting of my flaws,” he smiled and kissed her.

“Oh I’m not through yet,” she giggled and rolled onto her back, “when we were children you used to tease Nika so much she cried every time we came here, and you’re too competitive, and,” he kissed her.

“Enough of that,” he said. She smiled. “But you think I’m ready, despite all that?”

“I don’t know what ready means,” she admitted. “But I know your father isn’t going to die tomorrow. Probably not for a long time, he’ll be weak, and confused sometimes, but he’ll live.”

“You know this?” He said. She nodded. “How?”

“Because Nika and I are really very good at this,” she said. He smiled.

“Of course you are, Love,” he said. It was just an endearment, he didn’t really love her, he never said so. But still her heart raced when he said it.

“You’re going?” Brea asked, her face fully fallen. Harran looked at her kindly, and cupped her face.

“It’s a great honor, for me,” he said, “for us.” She narrowed her eyes. “I’m going to sit on The Queen’s Council.” That wasn’t why hew as excited to go. He was excited because his Lisette, his little farm girl turned out to actually be the Queen of Cammadan. She crossed her arms and frowned. “Don’t pout, Brea.”

“You don’t think she’ll actually want you?” She said sharply, her frown turning to a glare. “What have the Cammadie ever wanted from us but our land and bodies for their army?”

“You don’t know her,” he snapped back.

“Neither do you,” she argued, “you spent a few months with a little girl three years ago! I’m here, I’ve been here for years, in front of you, in your bed, at your side and it’s like you feel nothing!” He stared at her.

“Brea, I’m not leaving you,” he said. She swallowed. “But what am I supposed to do, ignore her?” Marry me, part of her thought, or at least take me with you. Promise me anything. “I’ll come back, and we’ll,” he exhaled. “We’ll make decisions then.”

“It’s up to you to decide it all then?” She said, she was seeing red, she was so furious.

“I think you’ve made your decisions,” he said. “You knew my feelings.” She raised her chin.

“I don’t seem to recall any complaints,” she said. His face flattened. “I’m sorry that I didn’t slink off into a corner and marry Rian because it would simplify your situation, Harran. Have a safe journey.” She turned on her heel and left.

Brea sat in silence looking over at Brightcoast palace from her horse. Nika was besides her.

“He probably wants to see you,” her sister said cheerfully. Brea looked at her.

“He probably needed a seer, and knew you’re too loyal to come without me,” she snorted and tossed her hair.

“Cynicism doesn’t suit you,” Nika sighed, “and if you’re the sarcastic one and the beautiful one, what does that leave me, hm?” Brea laughed. “Harran loves you, he’s just stubborn, I’m sure the minute he sees you again, he’ll drop to his knees begging you to take him back.” Brea smiled.

He hadn’t. And she couldn’t peg quite what was happening, between him and his farmgirl (Queen or not, Brea wouldn’t think of her as anything else.) but it was clearly enough that the Prince of Phania was nowhere to be found and Harran could barely make eye contact with her. They were settled in an elaborate and comfortable apartment after a meeting where she should have behaved better at, when Nika walked in and plopped down on the bed.

“What are you thinking about?” Brea asked, brushing out her hair. Nika bit her bottom lip and unwound her veil.

“She said she had Dream about me,” Nika mumbled. Brea laughed softly. This happened, from time to time, they’d walk in some place and Nika would notice some pretty girl and be distracted for a few days, but Duchess Marina was exceptionally pretty, and apparently had magic so, Nika might be a goner for weeks. She’d heard people say that the Duchess and the queen resembled each other, but she refused to think about that. “Did you talk to Harran?”

“I did not,” Brea shook her head, “and I don’t plan to.” She mustered her dignity into her spine. Nika shook her head. “He’s sleeping with her.”

“Yes, that was patently obviously,” Nika sighed. “I’m sorry.” Brea closed her eyes. “You should still talk to him.”

“He’s just going to tell me to go home and marry Rian,” she muttered. Nika laughed. “That’s his answer to everything. ‘Rian is a good man, he cares for you, it will please the elders!’ As if we haven’t shared a bed for two years.” She plopped next to her sister.

“Seems rather unfair to Rian, too,” Nika said. “To have his brother assume he’d be content as a consolation prize.” Brea smiled. Nika was of course right, and it wasn’t as though Rian and she hadn’t discussed the matter. She did like him, and never wanted to see him hurt in this crossfire.

That evening they sat through a rather painfully awkward dinner, though Nika seemed to be befriending the Cammadie. It was after dinner that it got really bad though. Harran walked out onto the terrace where Brea was watching the waves.

“I suppose we should talk,” he said. She turned and looked at him and smiled wickedly.

“What about?” She said. He sighed. “I’m not leaving you, Brea,” she repeated to him, “we’ll talk it about when I come home.”

“I had every intention,” he started.

“What did you say to her?” She asked and crossed her arms. “Did you talk about how you pined for her? How you would mumble her name in your sleep after you’d spent the night satisfying yourself with me?”

“There’s no reason to be cruel,” he said. She laughed then.

“I am not the cruel one in this scenario,” she said. “She doesn’t know who I am does she? You sent for me and didn’t even tell her!” He swallowed. “I can’t believe you,” she marched out onto the beach. “I don’t understand why you did send for me.”

“Because I needed to trust whoever it was, and I trust you.” She frowned.

“You needed someone with the sight and knew Nika wouldn’t come without me,” she said, her hurt rising. She would not cry in front of him. “I suppose I was fooling myself, because I thought maybe you actually wanted to see me.”

“Brea,” his voice went soft, pitying. “What am I supposed to do?” She frowned again.

“I don’t care what the elders say or even you,” she said, before he could even start. “I won’t marry Rian just because you changed your mind.”

I never made up my mind,” he said, “You made it up for me.” She swallowed another lump. “But things changed.”

“Yes, obviously,” she said, letting outa huff, “and now I’m supposed to just bow and smile to the woman who ruined my life. Wonderful.” She marched back into the palace and only when she knew Harran hadn’t followed did she let out a sob.

Two years of fruitless searches and long magic lessons had lead to and exhausted Brea asking if she could stay at the keep for longer than a few days. She was exhausted. Nika was pouting because Duchess Marina was in Dovetail. But they were needed anyway, as Chieftain Marcus was dying.

“I had wanted you as a daughter,” he said one day, as Brea ground some flowers to dry for his tea in the morning. She smiled gently at him.

“I wanted to be your daughter,” she said, gently. “It’s been my honor to care for you.” She brushed his hair off his forehead and applied a salve to his brow. He slept and she passed the time drying more leaves and flowers.

“How is he?” She turned and saw Harran in the doorway.

“Weak,” she said softly. “It won’t be long now.” He nodded. “We didn’t expect you yet.” He exhaled.

“Lisette and I,” he said, “I think we’ve reached an impasse.” She looked at him with half a smirk.

“She said no?” She asked. He nodded. “Well, she’s always been foolish.” He laughed.

“Not everyone sees me with your eyes, Brea,” he teased. She smiled. “I’m glad I didn’t miss him.”

“He’d have waited for you,” she said, “I think he has been.” He nodded. “Anders and Rian arrived a few days ago.” He nodded.

“Thank you for,” he swallowed. “Thank you, Brea.” She looked at him, she hadn’t looked at him in so long, she’d been afraid to, afraid to let her heart stop hating him.

“What else can I do?” She whispered.

Another six months went by, Harran was selected by the tribes, and Brea resumed her more nomadic life. She’d stopped in a tribal camp to name a few children, and she’d settled into a light sleep when the yells came.

“Is there a witch?” Came from one voice, male and she knew it. She shot off of her cot and out to the center, Prior Chastain and Tristan Dugarry were holding Harran up. “Brea, Thank Cornan,” Tristan said. She felt frozen.

“What happened?” She asked as they moved him into her tent. But she feltit instantly. Shadows. “How many were there?”

“Ten, maybe,” Prior said softly. I nodded. “Should we go?”

“No,” she said and knelt down. She brushed his hair off his face. He smiled at her. “What are you smiling about, Chieftan?”

“The gods are good,” he said, “I’m attacked by a shadow and in the nearest camp is Brea Averran.”

“Fool,” she shook her head, and looked at the two Cammadie Rangers. How in the Dark Lady’s web had it been woven that she was currently in a tent with all of Annalise Dovetail’s lovers. Was Eric of Phania going to stride in next? “Harran,” she whispered. “Do you remember our first night?”

“Vividly,” he tried to tease but his face was going pale. She nodded. “Is the cure for you to be naked and bossy?” She rolled her eyes and she noticed Prior grin.

“Hush,” she said, “when you touched me, you saw what I was thinking about, now I”m going to see your thoughts,” she slid her hand against his chest, “think of warmth, and joy.” She closed her eyes and her body filled with light from Harran to reflect back to him. Some things she recognized. Rian and Anders and him with their father as boys, learning their swords. The first time he’d made Nika laugh, a shared memory that she added hers to. And then an unexpected one, an unremarkable morning they’d spent together. Then the shadow rose out of him and hissed.

“Do you claim him?” It hissed. “Brea Averran, Desert Rose, lesser of two sisters?”

“Yes,” she said. “I claim this man, he is mine, you cannot have him.” She shot a beam of light at the shadow and it dispersed. She nearly fainted.

“Brea,” Prior caught her. She looked up at him. “It’s alright.” She swallowed and looked over. Harran’s color had returned. He was asleep but she could handle that. “What do you need?” She stared at him.

“Water,” she said. He nodded and left. I sat down and looked at Tristan.

“You claimed him,” he said. She swallowed. “That’s powerful magic, Brea.”

“What would you know about it?” She asked. He shrugged.

“You’re right,” he said, his voice deadpan, “I’ve spent the past two years hunting and fighting shadows and doing nearly nothing else, but what would I know about a claiming?” She glared at him. “You’re bound now, forever.”

“I was anyway,” she said. “I would think you of all people would understand that.” He smiled sadly.

“Yes,” he smiled, “I do understand.”

“How are you friends with them?” She asked. Tristan laughed.

“Prior and I were friends before he and Annalise began,” he exhaled “whatever they’re doing, and he,” he nodded to Harrani, “is a very difficult man to dislike.” She smiled. “I hate Eric and despise Damian Lestoff and your sister is a deeply suspicious person, if that comforts you at all. There’s also a Rastani merchant captain who if I ever see again I will probably murder.” She laughed. “I’ll leave you,” he kissed her on the cheek. She sat on the end of the cot and looked at Harran.

“You’re mine,” she whispered.

It had been weeks of misery. Harran was healing, but he was a terrible patient. She’d wanted to move on leaving his care to the apprentice in the camp but everyone had insisted that she continue to care for the Chieftain.

“Brea,” he said one evening from the much more comfortable bed, that had been set for him than the cot where she frist healed him. “Lay down with me.” She glared at him. “Not for that, I know I’m too weak.”

“What for then?” She asked.

“Because I’ve missed lying in bed with you for years.” He said. She looked at him. “Please? I’ll order them to give you room to leave if you do.”

“Oh honestly,” she said and lay down beside him, “it is my honor to care for the chieftains.” He smiled and wrapped his arms around her, their heartbeats began to sync. “Harran,” she mumbled. “What do you mean you missed lying with me?” He smiled. “Didn’t Annalise,” he sighed.

“I loved her,” he said, “but she carries heavy burdens, it makes her hard to talk to.” Brea smiled. “I could always talk to you.”

“What’s it been like?” She asked. He frowned.

“Strange,” he managed. “When people call me Chieftain, I still look for my father,” she smiled, “and I’m not used to Anders and Rian deferring to me. That’s very strange.” She laughed. “And this, for instance, you being compelled to stay with me, that wouldn’t have happened before.”

“I’m surprised they didn’t send for Nika,” she whispered. He smiled and kissed her softly.

“When will you stop that?” He asked.

“What?” She asked.

“Acting like people only value you in relation to Nika,” he said. “Your sister has a great many gifts, but she wasn’t the one who soothed my father’s fever enough that we could say goodbye,” he traced a finger to her hairline, “she didn’t convince Annalise that annexing the tribes wasn’t as productive as partnering with us. And she didn’t stand toe to toe with a shadow to save my life.” She lookedat him.

“I won’t let you do this to me again,” she whispered.

“Do what?” He asked.

“Make me love you and then pretend there’s nothing between us,” she whispered. He slipped her hair between his hands.

“When did I ever say there wasn’t anything between us?” He whispered. She rolled her eyes. “Alright, fine, but perhaps you were too pushy.”

“If you once said ‘no,'” she shrugged, “I would agree.” He laughed. “It was always ‘wait,’ so I did.” He kissed her again.

“Rian has never missed the chance to tell me what a I fool I was to turn you away,” he murmured. She laughed and they kissed again. He slid a hand to the fold in her robe.

“Harran,” she mumbled.

“You’re the healer,” he mumbled, “am I well enough?” She giggled. They kissed heavily.

“If you leave me again, I wil curse you,” she mumbled.

“I’m not leaving you ever again,” he whispered. “You’re mine.”

Note: OK, so, if two weeks ago we were talking about how Annalise is like Anton, here we get into how she’s like Marie. Also Olivia is still the best…and a Brayton insight that kind of…changes things, at least in my opinion. (And is also this sort of key detail about him that I realized I’ve never revealed. Mostly because, in what context would anyone talk about these events?)

Marie

She stood on the beach looking across the water and inhaled. She felt Anton step behind her and wrap his arms around her waist. It had been a year since she’d come to Cammadan and falling in love with Anton had brought her more peace than she thought possible.

“Do you still fear it?” He asked, kissing her neck gently. She cooed leaning back against him.

“No,” she sighed, “you’ll keep me safe.”

“I love you,” he said. “I think getting married here will be good.” She laughed.

“I haven’t said yes yet,” she turned around. He nodded.

“Hmm,” he said. “What could possibly be left to convince you?” She kissed him softly.

“Anton,” she said gently. “Loving each other is one thing, but marriage,” she swallowed. “My mandate,” he slid his hand to her stomach.

“Prophecies are misinterpreted all the time,” he said, “and I can think of worse things than a chosen king or queen for Cammadan.” She swallowed.

“It isn’t that simple,” she said, “didn’t Brayton tell you,” he laughed.

“I’m telling you I love you and want to marry you and you’re talking about Brayton’s jealous ramblings,” he said. She looked up at him. “He wants you, Marie, and he knows you don’t want him, it isn’t complicated.” She shook her head and pulled away. “Unless you do.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said, “you know I only want you.” He pulled her close again.

“And so you have me,” he whispered. “Marry me, love.”

“They’ll hate it,” she whispered sitting down in the sand.

“Who?” He frowned sitting with her.

“People,” she said. “Your people, the old lords. I’m foreign and insignificant! They want you to marry someone very grand and Cammadie!”

“And who is this grand Cammadie girl I’m meant for?” He was laughing.

“Please don’t laugh at me,” she said softly. “I don’t know, Olivia, I suppose.”

“If I asked Olivia to marry me now, she’d never speak to me again,” he said, “and my people will love you because I love you. And the old lords will eventually,” he fluttered his hand, “die I guess.” She looked at him and shook her head.

“I left Phania because I didn’t want to be a queen,” she said seriously.

“You didn’t want to be Daniel’s queen,” he countered. She scowled at him and stood up.

“Oh you have an answer for everything don’t you?” She fumed. “I know you aren’t used to being denied, Your Highness, but my answer is no!” She marched away. He stared at her retreating dumbfounded.

Anton

Anton walked into the bedroom and plopped down on the bed. The door opened behind him and Olivia Bano entered.

“Why are you in my bed, Anton?” She asked, sounding almost as annoyed as Marie had on the beach.

“The answer to that did used to be self evident, Livvie,” he rolled over and grinned at her. She frowned and narrowed her eyes.

“Are you drunk?” She scowled and placed a letter on her desk.

“Is that from Tom?” He asked. She frowned. “Marie turned me down.”

“What could she have been thinking?” Olivia deadpanned and sat down. “You’re just so charming!”

“Come comfort me,” he pouted.

“No,” she said.

“No?” He said. “I am clearly losing my irresistibility!” She huffed at him. “Why would she say no? I’m sensitive, clever, considerate, passionate, charming, handsome and heir to a throne.”

“And modest to boot!” Olivia gasped. He glared at her. “Marie loves you. Let that be enough.”

“It isn’t,” he said. “She said I should marry you.” She smiled.

“I hate to kick you when you’re down but, no thank you,” she said. He frowned at her.

“Is that a letter from Tom?” He asked. “I haven’t heard from him or John in weeks.” She crossed her arms defensively.

“It’s really none of your business,” she said. He sat up and looked at her. “It’s from Caleb.”

“Why?” He gaped. Caleb Pantona was an excellent courtier. He was also one of the dullest men in Anton’s acquaintance.

“We write sometimes,” she muttered, “while he’s in Pantona. We’re friends, like you and me.” He raised his eyebrows.

“So then he’s seen you naked,” Anton nodded. She glared at him. “You said like you and me.”

“I am once again, baffled as to why Marie wouldn’t want to marry you,” she said. He glared at her. “What do you actually want, my Prince?” She said gently. He looked up at her. “Don’t make a joke.”

“I want her,” he said, “forever.” She nodded.

“She’s offered you that,” she said. “But then you can’t marry.” He frowned. “That’s your choice.”

“When did you get so wise?” He said, taking her waist and pulling her down.

“When I grew up,” she shrugged.

“I don’t like it,” he frowned. “It’s quite annoying.” She giggled.

Marie

Marie sat in a courtyard at the University Outpost. She was still furious. How dare Anton treat her concerns like they were trivial, as if he could wave them away? And feel his desire overrode hers? She didn’t want to marry anyone! She’d offered him her love and her body and her companionship, and it wasn’t enough. He wanted vows that bound her to him and a destiny she wanted no part of.

“Marie?” Brayton walked out. He’d grown again. Two years younger than Anton, a year younger than her, he was still moving awkwardly between boyhood and manhood. “They said you were here to see me. Is everything alright?” His dark hair was just brushing his brow and his stormy grey eyes were concerned.

Those eyes. The same as Anton’s but somehow sadder and harder. She and Brayton had become friends when she first arrived. He had claimed to want to help her and Les sever her mandate. But lately being around him was difficult. She could sense the shift in his feelings for her and there was something else there, something darker.

“I,” she swallowed, “I told Anton no.” He blinked at her.

“Oh,” he sat down with her. “Why?” She looked at him.

“He doesn’t see me,” she sighed. “He doesn’t understand and he doesn’t seem to even want to try.” He cupped her face.

“I see you,” he whispered. She swallowed as he leaned closer and kissed her gently. She pulled away and stood up. “Marie, you have to know how I feel, I know you,” he followed her. “I know you don’t feel the same way. I didn’t even hope, because Anton is, well Anton,” she swallowed and looked at him, “but I do love you, and I’d take such good care of you, Marie, I would.”

“Kiss me again,” she said. He smiled and pulled her close and kissed her, more passionately this time. It was clumsy, but terribly sweet. Maybe this was why something in her was fighting against Anton. Maybe she belonged with Brayton. “Tell me what you want from me.” She said softly.

“From you?” Brayton lifted her chin. “I’ll take whatever you wish to give me.” She let him kiss her again. But her heart stayed steady, didn’t speed up, no heat spread over her blood. She didn’t love Brayton, but maybe she could bask in his love for her, and her own would grow.

Anton

This trip to Brightcoast had been hastily put together. He’d done it in hopes of pleasing Marie and now he hadn’t even seen her in days. He wanted to apologize or something, anything, he just wanted to see her.

Instead she walked into the dining room for the only official supper they were having before returning to Dovetail in a week, and he jumped out of his seat to run to her, and he froze seeing she was on his cousin’s arm. He felt like an invisible hand had taken hold of her throat. Marie, in her simple white gown, and her dark curls piled on her head, decorated with borrowed pearls from Anne, with Brayton, who looked entirely too pleased with himself for Anton’s mind. He strode over to them.

“Lady Marie, you look lovely,” he took her hand and kissed it.

“Your Highness,” she said. Her eyes met his. What was she thinking?

“Cousin,” Anton said, his jaw clenched and Brayton smirked. “I didn’t know you were joining us.”

“Had I known you were coming I would have been to see you sooner, of course,” Brayton said. “But until Marie came to see me I hadn’t the slightest idea court was in Brightcoast.” Came to see him? Why had she gone to see him?

“It isn’t full court, as you can see,” Anton said. “I know you came here to study, I didn’t wish to distract you.” Brayton smirked again.

“Brayton has agreed to come back Dovetail,” Marie said softly. Anton clenched his jaw.

“Has he?” He said. “How fortunate.””

“Of course,” Brayton looked at Marie, “after all, nothing is more distracting than being apart.” Anton frowned. He didn’t understand what was happening, but he needed to speak to Marie.

Marie

She stood out on the terrace and took a deep breath. A year ago she’d met Anton out here, now she didn’t know what was happening, how her life had become such a mess.

“You only needed to tell me,” Anton’s voice drifted behind her. “If it was that you wanted to be with Brayton, I wouldn’t have,” he exhaled. She looked at him. “How tedious these last few months must have been for you.” He was so hurt. He could never mask his heart, she loved him so much for it.

“It isn’t what you think,” she swallowed, there were tears in her eyes, “I went to see him after I left you.” Anton was standing so straight and tall. “I just needed someone to talk to. And he,” she exhaled. “He isn’t you,” she whispered. “I love you. But I can’t give you what you need and he just wants me. I can give that.” Anton pulled her close and kissed her deeply. Her heart fluttered, her body flushed she clung to him like it might save her life.

She’d never be kissed by Anton Dovetail again. What a horrible thought. He’d never touch her, or make love to her again, or laugh when she got frustrated, or a million small things that made him perfect.

“I’ll never love anyone else,” Anton whispered. “I think the gods put me in this world for you.” She swallowed. “Be happy with him, Marie, you deserve so much joy.” She looked up at him and swallowed and he squeezed her hand and stepped away.

That night rather than return to the university, Brayton came to her bed. Like his kisses, his lovemaking was eager, sweet, and a bit clumsy.

“I’ve wanted this for so long,” he murmured as he moved in her.

“Brayton,” she whispered, doing her best to draw pleasure from him. He groaned as she said his name and finished. He held her and she slept. She Dreamed that night of a girl with soft caramel skin and grey Dovetail eyes, and she was carrying Anton’s sword.

Anton

Olivia found him on the beach, a bottle of her beloved Caleb’s Pantona whiskey half drunk beside him.

“Oh Anton,” she said. He smiled up at her.

“Spose the next girl will go to, I dunno,” he muttered, “my father? John? You’re with my best frien,” he hiccuped. “She’s with my cousin. Running out of men close by to be left for.” She sat down with him. “Why’d you choose Tom?” She frowned.

“I don’t think that’s the same,” she whispered. “You weren’t in love with me.” He frowned.

“Livvie,” he kissed her neck, “we were nice though. I liked being with you. Didn’t hurt. This hurts.” She pushed him away gently. “Course, you’ve got Pantona now. Pretty Livvie Bano needs her title.”

“You’re drunk so I’m going to let that one slide,” she said. He fell backwards.

“That was mean,” he said, “you’re right. Bet Brayton’s not mean. Pious, smug little shit. With his books and his magic and his, his,” he frowned. “My Marie. But she’s his now.”

“What will make you feel better?” She asked. He took her hand and pulled her on top of him. “Besides sex, Anton.”

“No, no,” he said, “sex will be good. Tom won’t mind, he understands. Plus he’s with that merchant boy.” She frowned and stood up. “Livvie, wait.”

“Come see me when you’re ready to apologize,” she said. “We aren’t just your toys, Anton. The rest of us have lives to live too.”

Marie

Marie woke up to Brayton dressing. He smiled as she sat up.

“I didn’t want to wake you,” he said and kissed her gently. “You were fitful, is everything alright?”

“I was,” she started, but stopped short of telling him she was Dreaming. She’d have to told Anton, she realized. “I just don’t sleep well.” She lied. He nodded. The door swung open and Lady Olivia Bano burst in.

“Hello Lady Olivia,” Brayton purred sarcastically at her. She stared daggers at him. “I’ll see you later, Marie?”

“Of course,” she whispered. He kissed her, possessively, as if proving something. He left the two girls in icy silence.

“I know we don’t know each other well, but may I ask what in the hell you think you’re doing?” Olivia finally broke it. “Anton is beside himself! I am certainly on your side about the marriage, he was being a terrible bully about it, but whatever this is,” she exhaled. “It’s cruel.”

“You couldn’t understand,” Marie stood up, pulling a robe on. Olivia frowned. “I can’t be with Anton, I can’t. And I can’t be alone either, I need,” she sighed. “If I don’t have someone to protect me, my brother will continue to delay.” Olivia stared at her. “Daniel could,” she hugged herself, “well, call me back basically.” Olivia nodded. “Les deserves his happiness. And Brayton is powerful, and he adores me,” she looked down. “But I won’t lose myself to him. I love Anton too much, he’d take all of me and not even realize he was doing it.”

“I understand that better than you might think,” Olivia said gently. Marie nodded. “I think we’d all give our whole selves to Anton before he realized he’d asked too much of us.” She paused. “Tom is in love with someone else,” she whispered. “I see it, in his letters, the way he writes about him. He’s only ever talked that way about Anton. Sometimes I think I went to Anton to please Tom, if he couldn’t have him, I could.” She looked down. “I broke my own heart for him, but you don’t have to Marie.” Marie looked at her and started crying.

“What have I done?” She whispered. “He won’t forgive me, how could he?” Olivia held her while she cried.

Anton

They’d returned to Dovetail and he was avoiding her as much as possible. Complete avoidance was impossible, of course, as Brayton’s sudden interest in being present meant Marie was at his side.

Sometime in Anton made him feel like his cousin was torturing him. And something was wrong with Marie. She seemed desperately unhappy, and it seemed like Brayton hadn’t noticed.

“You need to find someone,” his father said one afternoon. “I know you’re disappointed, I understand, but Anton,” he sighed.

“I know,” Anton said softly. “I know, I do. Can’t you and Mother just pick someone?” His father laughed.

“I believe your mother would certainly try,” he said, “if either of us thought it would make you even remotely happy.”

Anton glanced across the courtyard to see Marie sitting with one of her books. He excused himself and walked across. She looked up at him.

“May I help you?” She asked.

“I suppose not,” he said. She furrowed her brow. “I think I forgot,” she smiled gently. “I miss you.”

“Oh Anton, please don’t,” she whispered. “What’s the point?” He sat down.

“The point is I miss you,” he whispered. “And you seem unhappy.” She swallowed. “If you were happy, maybe I could,” she smiled indulgently. “Well, no, I guess I couldn’t.”

“No,” she said, “you couldn’t.” He pressed his hand against her cheek. “I miss you too.” He leaned in and kissed her gently.

“Sweet girl.” She sighed softly.

“Could I still say yes?” She whispered.

“Yes,” he said. She smiled. He vowed to himself to make her smile everyday for the rest of their lives.

Marie

She stood in her room folding a few things to go in a trunk, humming to herself. The door opened and she looked up.

“You sent for me?” Brayton asked, wrapping his arms around her from behind. She slid away. “What’s wrong? I thought, when you, that you wanted me, we haven’t since that night.”

“Brayton, I,” she exhaled, “this was wrong, of me. Leading you on,” he frowned, he looked so young again. “That night, we shouldn’t have.”

“I don’t understand.” He said.

“I accepted Anton this afternoon,” she said. Brayton stared at her.

“Why?” He asked.

“I love him,” she mumbled. “I know this hurt you, I’m sorry.”

“I love you,” he said. “I thought you understood.” She swallowed. “You’re going to marry him?” She nodded. She saw it then, on his face, in his eyes. The dark thing, whatever it was. “Fine, then, I wish you joy.” He marched out and slammed the door. She exhaled and prayed to Rana that he’d forgive them, though somehow she doubted it.

Content Warning: This story contains references to and descriptions of Domestic Child Abuse. If you are aware of or suffering from Child Abuse, please contact your state CPS, (A list of United States CPS Agencies can be found at childwelfare.gov) or if you are in crisis contact the Crisis Text Line at 741-741

Caleb

Viscount Caleb Pantona was not looking forward to dinner that evening.

“Her name is Lady Olivia Bano,” his mother had said, helping him into his jacket. He sighed. “I met her last week at the palace. I think you’ll enjoy her.”

“Carmine Bano’s daughter?” Caleb asked. His mother nodded. “Carmine Bano is opportunistic scum” His mother laughed.

“True, but that’s hardly the girl’s fault,” she kissed him on the cheek. “You need to marry, Caleb. I had hopes for you and Anne Brightcoast, but that Phanian friend of yours turned her head and she’s not coming back.” Caleb smiled. Anne would have been a good match, and her falling in love with Lestat Sanpierre was indeed inconvenient.

“So this is every night this winter then?” He asked. She nodded. “Bring on the debutantes, I suppose. Anton’s bound to disappoint a few of them.”

“That’s the spirit,” she smirked.

Caleb stood up as Carmine Bano and his daughter entered. Lady Olivia was wearing a simple white gown and her long red hair was down her back. Caleb thought he might swallow his tongue. She was almost otherworldly beautiful.

“Caleb,” his father said. Caleb cleared his throat and walked over to Lady Olivia.

“My lady,” he said, “I’m glad to finally meet you.” She raised an eyebrow as he kissed her hand.

“Your Grace,” she said, “I hadn’t realized my presence was anticipated.” He smiled. She was clever too.

“A beautiful woman’s presence is always anticipated,” he pointed out. She smirked. He spent dinner doing his best to engage her so she didn’t think he was a blithering idiot but he was reasonably sure he failed.

Olivia

Olivia smiled to herself the next morning as she drank her tea thinking of Viscount Caleb. She didn’t want him, but of her father’s assortment he was certainly the best. Tall, with auburn hair that curled at the ends and clear blue eyes, he also had a boyish face and an easy laugh.

“Oh Good,” John Dugarry walked in, “you’re alive.” She looked at him and giggled. “Anton and Tom will be thrilled.”

“I didn’t realize they were so concerned about my whereabouts,” she said as he sat down. “My father wanted to introduce me to some of his friends.”

“Ah,” John nodded. “Of course.” She swallowed. “Did he hurt you again?” She looked away and shook her head. “Livvie,” he said softly. “If he does, you should.”

“He wants what’s best for me,” she said. “Are you here to escort me to the palace?”

“You don’t miss anything,” he grinned. Her father walked in. “Ah, hello Lord Bano.”

“Captain Dugarry,” he said, “may I have a moment with my daughter?” John nodded and excused himself. “What does he want?”

“The Prince wants to see me,” she went to stand up, “I shouldn’t keep him waiting,” her father grabbed her wrist and she twitched. “Papa,” she whispered.

“You aren’t some tavern wench he can summon whenever he wants you,” he hissed. “Remember that, remind him of that.” Olivia nodded and he let go. She followed after her. She pulled her sleeve down and walked out with John.

“Your father’s friends,” John said. She looked at him. “So Careton?”

“Obviously,” she said. He nodded.

“Then I’d guess, Wallace, Allred,” he smirked. She sighed and nodded. “But you haven’t been to the palace in four nights so I’m missing someone.”

“Pantona,” she said softly. He laughed.

“Well, Careton’s too old, Wallace doesn’t like women, and Allred is an idiot,” he said, “Caleb Pantona though, that’s a real threat. Anton should be worried.”

“He shouldn’t,” she said. John smirked at her. “He could have come to see me himself.”

“I told him as much,” John shrugged.

“Is he serious?” She asked. “You’d know, he tells you everything.” She looked away, she hated herself for asking.

“I think he’s considering being serious,” John said. “Tom is serious. Deadly serious.” She nodded. They’d all been friends, before. John was still her friend. She wished she could pinpoint when and what exactly had changed. And she wished it didn’t give her a knot in her stomach.

Caleb

That night Caleb walked into the palace hall and looked around. He’d gone by Bano house first had been informed that Lord Bano and Lady Olivia weren’t there. He hoped they were here but he knew there was no guarantee of that either.

“Caleb?” Anne Brightcoast walked up to him, surprised. “What on earth on you doing here?” She hugged him.

“I got to town a few days ago,” he explained. “I’m sorry I haven’t been to see you.”

“Hm,” she frowned. “I’ll forgive you if you walk me in. I can’t take another night of suitors.” Caleb smile and took her arm.

“You’ll tell Les I was taking care of you,” he said. She shot him a look. “My mother is terribly disappointed, by the way.”

“About Les?” She said. “So kind of her to be so invested in my happiness.” He barked a laugh. “Just your mother then?”

“Well, I agree with her that it would be tidy,” he pointed out, “but I do want you to be happy, and I’m not the man for that particular job.” She sighed as he glanced around the hall.

“You’re looking for someone!” She gasped. He sighed loudly. “Caleb, are you in love?”

“I wouldn’t go that far, I’m just,” he frowned. “We had Carmine Bano and his daughter to dinner last night.” She frowned. “I wanted to say hello.”

“Olivia Bano?” She said. “Well, I know where you’ll find her.” He followed as she pointed to the front of the room. Lady Olivia was sitting beside Prince Anton, who was whispering in her ear and making her giggle. She looked outstandingly lovely, her dark auburn hair piled on her head and an elaborate blue gown rustling with her every move. He swallowed. “Of course as it’s Anton, I’m sure he’ll have moved on in a week or so, he usually does, but then there’s Tom Martin.” His eyes got wide.

“Tom Martin?” He said. Anne nodded. “So you’re saying the first girl I’ve found interesting in, well, ever, is being pursued by the crown prince and Cornan’s chosen champion?”

“Unfortunately,” she sighed. “But by all means say hello. She’ll probably enjoy it. You’re reasonably good looking and charming when you want to be,” She kissed him on the cheek and floated away.

Olivia

“Anton, stop,” Olivia said softly with a giggle as he kissed behind her ear gently. “Everyone’s looking.” They’d spent the afternoon in his room, she didn’t know what she was going to tell Tom, but it had been fun. She didn’t really expect more than fun from Anton, as much as she loved him.

“Let them,” he grinned, his grey eyes sparkling, “why shouldn’t everyone know I adore you?” She silenced him with a look and he leaned back. “Fine then, but you can’t disappear for a week like that again.”

“I wanted to be here,” she said, “but I can’t,” she exhaled, “my father.” She thought of the bruise forming on her wrist from where he’d grabbed her earlier. Did Anton see it?

“He doesn’t approve?” He teased.

“He has plans,” she said softly, “and I’m not sure he believes you’re serious about me.” Anton smiled. “And as I know you aren’t serious about anyone, well,” she shrugged.

“I could be serious,” he said. She picked up her wine and shook her head and laughed. “Gods, why is Caleb Pantona coming over here?” Olivia swallowed. The Viscount looked even more handsome tonight than he had before. His height and long limbs moved gracefully and his deep bow was mesmerizing.

“Your Highness,” Viscount Caleb said with a smile, but he was making eye contact with Olivia. She blushed.

“Viscount,” Anton said, he sounded annoyed. Olivia couldn’t help but be amused. “You know Lady Olivia Bano, I assume?”

“Of course, My Lady,” he took her hand and kissed it.

“Your Grace,” she said, “The Viscount’s parents had my father and me for dinner yesterday. I didn’t expect to see you again so soon.”

“I went to see you this afternoon but I believe you were already out,” The Viscount smiled, “but I was hoping to at least claim a dance.”

“Of course,” Olivia smiled. Anton was scowling. Viscount Caleb bowed again.

“Livvie,” Anton said, “you’re spoken for!” She straightened her shoulders.

“Am I?” She said. He growled something about being as good as. “Oh, you’re being ridiculous, it’s a dance Anton, I’ll dance with you and Tom too.”

“I don’t see what Tom has to do with it at all,” he glared. She rolled her eyes. Boys were impossible.

Olivia had had enough of watching Anton be absorbed by that Phanian girl, and she was angry at Tom for leaving without a thought to how it would effect them. She knew she had to explain something to her father. He’d be furious about Anton so she rushed into the hall.

“Lady Olivia,” Viscount Caleb of Pantona walked out of the library. She looked at him. “I didn’t realize you were still here.”

“I was looking for my father,” she said, “I wanted to say goodnight.”

“He retired about an hour ago,” he said. She exhaled. “If you’d like, I’ll walk you to your rooms.”

“I’d like that very much,” she said softly. It wouldn’t hurt to flirt with him a little. “Why are you still awake?” He laughed.

“I don’t sleep well,” he said, “so court life obviously suits me.” She nodded. “You?”

“I was waiting for Anton,” she said softly, “I lost track of time, obviously he did too.” He nodded. “Are you staying all summer?”

“No,” he said, “I have to get home for harvest at some point.” She cocked her head to the side. “That surprises you?”

“A little,” she said, “most of the men who,” she stopped, “I just assumed you spent most of your time in Dovetail, I mean.” He laughed lightly.

“Finish your thought,” he said, “most of the men your father threw at you.” She blushed and looked down. “I’m not an idiot, Lady Olivia,” he said, “I’m an excellent prospect and you’re hardly the first girl from a Dovetail family I’ve been flung at.” She giggled and looked up at him. “Most of them aren’t as pretty as you though.”

“Well done,” she said as they reached her door. “I’ve never seen anyone pivot quite that well.” He smiled.

“Not even Prince Anton,” he said, “or Commander Martin,” she blushed again. “I happen to be telling the truth,” he said and turned her face up, “but I think you know that. I think you’re quite aware you’re the most beautiful girl in every room you walk into.” She frowned. He’d been so honest and easy earlier, now it felt like he was flattering her and she didn’t like it.

“What do you want from me?” She said. “Besides what every other man does when he sees that girl walking in the room I mean.” He frowned, then.

“I don’t want anything from you,” he said, “why would I?” She bit her bottom lip. “Like I said before, I’m an excellent prospect, I can get that anywhere,” she swallowed, “I want you to see me, Lady Olivia,” he said, “All I care about is if you want me, if you want to be with me.” She swallowed and quickly turned and opened the door and rushed in. Her father was sitting in an arm chair with a glass of something brown in his hand.

“You’re late,” he muttered.

“I was waiting for Prince Anton,” she said softly, “I didn’t want to be rude.” He nodded. “And then I was coming back and ran into Viscount Caleb,” he stood up. “He walked me back.”

“The Duke of Careton went home tonight.” She swallowed. “He’s marrying some tenant’s daughter.” She looked down. “Did he apologize? The Prince. He made a fool of you tonight.” She exhaled, she wanted to say the right thing. He grabbed her chin. “Olivia, answer me.”

“No,” she said, “of course not, and it isn’t,” she exhaled, “he was only being polite, I’m sure.”

“And the Viscount? Are you more certain there?” He said. She looked down and then felt the heavy slap across her face. “Anton made you his whore, and now he’s moved on, so I suggest you fix it.” She nodded. “Go to sleep, I can’t stand the sight of you.” She rushed to her room and cried herself to sleep, not even changing out of her gown.

Caleb

Caleb had gone to leave when he heard shouting from the other side of the door. Then the slap and whimper. He froze. He ought to break the door down. He’s noticed certain things. The way she flinched when her father went to touch her, bruises here or there. He hadn’t wanted to believe it. But now, well, there was just no denying it.

He went to find her the next morning and found her sitting in a courtyard reading.

“Hello,” she looked up at him with a smile, but her eyes were still rimmed with red. He looked serious. “Is something wrong Your Grace?”

“I don’t know quite where to begin,” he said, “are you alright?” She swallowed.

“My feelings are a little hurt,” she said, she was trying to tease. “Anton does get distracted, but usually not quite so seriously. And with Tom and John leaving,” she swallowed. “We’ll have plenty of time to get to know one another better, I suppose.”

“That isn’t what I meant,” he whispered, and took her hand. “You can trust me.” She swallowed and stood up. “Please, Olivia, trust me.” She looked at him.

“My father lost his temper last night,” she said, “that’s all.” He looked at her. “I just have to get through the next few months, and I thought,” he exhaled. “But if Anton isn’t,” she exhaled. “I’m engaged. My father doesn’t know, he thinks I’m still, that Anton and I,” He nodded.

“But you can’t marry Tom Martin if your father beats you to death,” Caleb said gently. She stared at him. “Does he know?” She shook her head. “The Prince?” She shook it again. “Gods.” He whispered and went to hold her. “Always come to me, I’ll protect you.” She looked up at him.

“You don’t hate me?” She said. “I’d be using you!” He smiled gently.

“You’re welcome to,” he said, “I don’t feel punished by spending time with you.” She looked up at him. “I feel a little selfish, for wanting you to hide with me.” He cupped a hand gently against her face. “But I can help you Olivia, I can keep you safe, let me.”

Olivia

Olivia paced in her bedroom, Anton and Marie had announced their engagement. She was thrilled for them. Marie had asked her to served as Lady in waiting, she was honored. She’d watched the boy she once hoped to marry grow into a man who deeply loved someone, even if it was someone else.

But now she was away from the crowd and all she could feel was dread. Caleb had been watching her carefully all night, it was the only thing that had made her feel calm.

“OLIVIA!” Her father’s voice bellowed through the house. She swallowed as he opened the door, holding a leather strap.

“Papa, please,” she whispered, “please, I won’t,” but all her begging and pleading didn’t stop it, and the next thing she remembered she was standing on the front step of his house. She hadn’t changed, hadn’t done anything, just run.

Caleb

“Olivia?” Caleb said opening the door. “Come inside, darling what is it?” She was sobbing. “I’ll take your cloak.” He reached for it and she flinched.

“No,” she said, “I shouldn’t have come here, but I didn’t know,” she paused. “There wasn’t anywhere else.” He carefully touched her face.

“Come along,” he said softly, ushering her to a parlor. “Do you want tea? Something stronger.” He noticed the way the cloak was sticking to her. “Gods,” he whispered, and carefully peeled it off of her and saw her ruined gown and the gashes bleeding on her back. He was furious. He’d murder her father, if he thought it would help. “You need a healer, I’ll send to the university.”

“No,” she said, stopping him from ringing the bell. “I just,” she swallowed, “I need to get cleaned up, but I was,” she looked down. “I thought he was going to kill me, Caleb, I don’t know what to do.”

“You don’t have to do anything,” he said. “You’ll stay here.” She swallowed.

“Anton can’t know,” she said panicking and standing up wringing her hands. “He’ll think it’s his fault and it isn’t. Marie’s wonderful and he loves her,” she paced. “Tom is so far away and he hasn’t written in weeks.” He stood up and took her hands.

“Look at me,” he whispered, “you need a healer, or you’ll get infected. No one has to know if you don’t want them to.” She was still sobbing and gasping. He grabbed the bell and rang it. A girl with dark auburn hair walked in. “Go to The University and ask for a healer to come, a woman if you can manage it. And have a bath drawn and get one of my mother’s robes for Lady Olivia.” The girl nodded and rushed out. She swallowed and pressed her head against his chest. “Everything is going to be fine.”

“How?” She whispered. “He’s going to kill me,” she whispered.

“No,” he said softly, “I promise you, that won’t happen.”

Caleb sat watching the healer work over Olivia’s back, glaring at him occasionally. He didn’t blame her, it certainly looked as though he’d had something to do with this.

“You’ll be fine,” the healer said, “there’ll be scars but nothing anyone but a lover would ever see.” Olivia nodded and sat up. “Viscount.” The Healer slipped out. Olivia looked at him.

“Thank you,” she said softly. He nodded.

“Get some rest,” he whispered. “You won’t have to wear my mother’s things for long, yours will be here in the morning.” She nodded. He walked out of the room and then to the large Bano townhouse and marched in to where Olivia’s father was sitting, far too calmly, staring at the fire. “A moment, sir?”

“This is unexpected,” Carmine Bano looked at him. “Did you bring her back or do you intend to keep her?” Caleb looked at him and grabbed him from the chair and shoved him against the wall.

“She won’t be coming back here,” Caleb said, nearly growling, his hand around this man’s throat. “And if you ever try to get near her again, I’ll kill you, very simply, very cleanly.” He stepped back. “As far as your daughter is concerned, her father died tonight. Get whoever it is you pay to keep their mouths shut about whipping a girl nearly to death to pack Olivia’s things and have them sent to my house. This game is over.” He stood up and stalked out of the house and then back home.

He’d be damned before he let anyone ever hurt her again.

Olivia

Olivia woke up and twitched. Her back was still tingling, and all she could think of was the awful sting and burn of the leather where her father had struck over and over again.

She closed her eyes. Caleb had taken care of her. He’d gotten her healed and clean and given her a place to cry herself to sleep. But she would have to go home. And she didn’t know what that would look like. Her father, his reaction to this. He’d be furious, except that he could leverage this into an engagement.

“Good morning,” Caleb said softly walking in, holding a cup of tea. “Do you?” She nodded and reached out taking it. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” she said, “Thank you.” He nodded. “I know I can’t stay here, but I appreciate it.” He looked confused. “Maybe I can go in as Marie’s lady in waiting early. She’s not technically supposed to have one yet, but,”

“Of course you can stay here,” he said. She looked at him. “I told your father as much when I saw him last night.”

“You WHAT?” She said jumping out of bed. His face was flat and serious.

“If you don’t want to, of course, we can make other arrangements,” he said softly, “but you can’t go back there, and I won’t let anyone hurt you.” She stepped closer to him. “Olivia,” he muttered cautiously.

“Caleb,” she said softly.

“Don’t play with me,” he said softly. She swallowed. “Please, I don’t know how else to say it. I’m glad to be your friend if that’s what you need from me,” he said, “but I care for you, more than I realized, and if you don’t and can’t see yourself caring for me the same way,” he exhaled, “we can’t cross that line.” She rested her hands against his chest.

“Caleb,” she smiled gently, he nodded. “Please kiss me. I’ve been thinking about you kissing me for months.” He pulled her close and kissed her gently at first. Their mouths only gently opened. She deepened her hold on him, molding her body against his and then pulled away. “Well, that was lovely,” she said softly. He smiled.

“Yes it was,” he said. They kissed again and fell back against the bed. He moved his hand to her thigh and she whimpered gently. “I’ve wanted this for a long time.” She smiled shyly.

She wasn’t an innocent. There was Tom, and Anton. But Caleb’s touch, and the way he made her feel, and the way he talked made her feel shy, like she’d never even been alone with a man, let alone had a few lovers.

“I want you,” she said softly, running her hands over his chest. He moved his kiss to her neck. He sat up, straddling over her and undressed. She leaned up on her elbows.

“Are you sure?” He asked, lowering her back down under him. “It’s the point of no return, Olivia.” She smiled and cocked her head to the side.

“I’m sure,” she whispered. He slid his hand between her legs and spread her thighs. She exhaled a whimper.

“Mm,” he said as his fingers found her soft spot. “I do like all your little noises.” She panted as he started working her gently, whimpering and writhing a bit. “Tell me what you like, Olivia.”

“This,” she groaned arching into his fingers, “I like this so much.” He moved the material off her shoulder, letting the robe fall off of her completely, then he kissed down to her chest and found her nipple and sucked on it softly. “Caleb,” she exhaled, closing her eyes. “Yes, please,” she groaned. “More.” He pulled away and then straddled her again. “Don’t stop,” she whispered.

“I just want to look at you,” he said brushing her hair off her face. “So beautiful, I can barely believe it.” She smiled as he cupped her cheek. They kissed again he pressed into her, gently, moving in and out. “Olivia,” he whispered. And he repeated it over and over again. He shuddered.

“It’s alright,” she said, “I use whip willow.” He groaned and finished. After they lay together. “I like the way you say my name.” She whispered. “You use the whole O,” he laughed, fingering her palm. “And you don’t call me Livvie, like we’re still children.”

“Olivia,” he whispered and kissed her on top of her head.

“Caleb,” she said softly.

“Come to Pantona with me,” he said, “marry me. Let me keep you safe.” She smiled and touched his face gently, he pressed his lips against her palm.

“I can’t just run away to Pantona,” she said. He sighed and stretched, still smiling but something sad in it.

“Martin?” He asked. She nodded.

“I owe him a conversation, at least,” she said gently, “I do want to marry you.” She stretched.

“How are you feeling?” He asked. She smiled.

“Fine,” she said, “good. Thank you, for being my safe place.”

“I’ll always be here,” he promised. “For you, always.” She pressed her forehead to his. “I love you,” he whispered. She exhaled, feeling safe in that declaration.

“I love you too,” she whispered.